1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:20,670 [MUSIC PLAYING] 2 00:00:20,670 --> 00:00:23,260 In '61 I was lost. 3 00:00:23,260 --> 00:00:26,200 I was looking for myself. 4 00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:29,670 It's embarrassing to ask me what I was doing in 1961. 5 00:00:29,670 --> 00:00:31,840 Oh, well I met Mo Saltzman of course. 6 00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:34,370 Mo was a compelling guy. 7 00:00:34,370 --> 00:00:37,830 He was short, heavy, stocky, heavy, 8 00:00:37,830 --> 00:00:39,960 strong though, and very agile. 9 00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:40,890 I mean he moved beautifully. 10 00:00:40,890 --> 00:00:43,580 He was this kind of intense short little guy 11 00:00:43,580 --> 00:00:47,620 with big ideas, talked a mile a minute, very philosophical, 12 00:00:47,620 --> 00:00:48,800 a real impresario. 13 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:52,650 He says well listen, I'm having a party today. 14 00:00:52,650 --> 00:00:53,820 Would you like to come? 15 00:00:53,820 --> 00:00:55,580 We went up to this big old house, 16 00:00:55,580 --> 00:00:57,320 a big old mansion-type house. 17 00:00:57,320 --> 00:01:02,070 It was big, and it was open, and it was so California. 18 00:01:02,070 --> 00:01:04,090 It was out in Chatsworth. 19 00:01:04,090 --> 00:01:07,420 And we went into the backyard, and there are quite 20 00:01:07,420 --> 00:01:08,830 a few odd things going on. 21 00:01:08,830 --> 00:01:11,100 But you have to remember, I went to Hollywood High. 22 00:01:11,100 --> 00:01:14,530 First I saw a couple of nude ladies running around. 23 00:01:14,530 --> 00:01:19,880 Next thing I know, something's rubbing up against me, and-- 24 00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:24,960 And then some man ran through across just the hallway. 25 00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,550 He didn't have a stitch on. 26 00:01:26,550 --> 00:01:29,460 And he had a bone on him like this. 27 00:01:29,460 --> 00:01:30,360 And-- 28 00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:34,000 Everybody started kissing and fucking. 29 00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:38,820 And I got caught up in it. 30 00:01:38,820 --> 00:01:40,420 I just got caught up in it. 31 00:01:40,420 --> 00:01:42,770 Breasts and assholes and balls. 32 00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,210 Men on top of men. 33 00:01:44,210 --> 00:01:46,110 There were women on top of women. 34 00:01:46,110 --> 00:01:48,110 Sometimes it was two. 35 00:01:48,110 --> 00:01:49,720 Sometimes it was three. 36 00:01:49,720 --> 00:01:53,500 Imagine having six or seven people work on you at one time. 37 00:01:53,500 --> 00:01:57,820 There were like 15 couples there, all bunched together, 38 00:01:57,820 --> 00:01:58,990 you know, shtupping away. 39 00:01:58,990 --> 00:02:00,620 It was like a plate of calamari. 40 00:02:00,620 --> 00:02:05,100 I open my eyes and there's a camera looking at me. 41 00:02:05,100 --> 00:02:06,690 It might have been one of the first 42 00:02:06,690 --> 00:02:10,550 recorded organized, quasi-not orgy 43 00:02:10,550 --> 00:02:13,240 orgies that came out of Mo. 44 00:02:13,240 --> 00:02:17,870 The things I did that day, that I'm not particularly proud of. 45 00:02:17,870 --> 00:02:18,990 But there's nothing I wouldn't do 46 00:02:18,990 --> 00:02:20,800 for a good pastrami sandwich. 47 00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:25,800 I think that was the beginning of the Mo Saltzman legend. 48 00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:26,690 That was the beginning. 49 00:02:26,690 --> 00:02:28,520 I think that afternoon was the beginning of everything. 50 00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:32,310 [MUSIC PLAYING] 51 00:02:34,690 --> 00:02:37,260 NARRATOR: Mo Saltzman was, without question, 52 00:02:37,260 --> 00:02:39,140 the most influential pornographer 53 00:02:39,140 --> 00:02:40,070 of the 20th century. 54 00:02:40,070 --> 00:02:42,880 I mean here's a guy who made hundreds of commercially 55 00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:46,600 successful films, from fun-loving nudie cuties 56 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:51,320 to darkly original sexploitation films, to his groundbreaking 57 00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:52,960 work in musical pornography. 58 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:56,930 But what really separated Mo from everyone else 59 00:02:56,930 --> 00:03:00,440 was that he made pornos that mattered. 60 00:03:00,440 --> 00:03:02,110 I mean, I remember I was 10 years old, 61 00:03:02,110 --> 00:03:05,290 and my Uncle Andy snuck me into the Corinthian Theater 62 00:03:05,290 --> 00:03:06,250 there in San Francisco. 63 00:03:06,250 --> 00:03:07,080 I'll never forget it. 64 00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:10,530 It was a matinee performance of a Fistful of Penis. 65 00:03:10,530 --> 00:03:11,670 And it was a revelation. 66 00:03:11,670 --> 00:03:14,680 It was a life changing event for me. 67 00:03:14,680 --> 00:03:15,490 I was 10 years old. 68 00:03:15,490 --> 00:03:16,940 I'd seen a lot of porn. 69 00:03:16,940 --> 00:03:20,230 But I had never seen anything like a Mo, because no one had. 70 00:03:20,230 --> 00:03:23,120 Mo took the medium and he massaged it. 71 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:24,910 And he was able to really address 72 00:03:24,910 --> 00:03:27,410 social and political issues of his time. 73 00:03:27,410 --> 00:03:30,100 Now that is Moe. 74 00:03:30,100 --> 00:03:31,050 [HELICOPTER] 75 00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:35,590 We're living the Constitution. 76 00:03:35,590 --> 00:03:38,500 We're-- we're the physical and mental 77 00:03:38,500 --> 00:03:42,980 embodiment of our rights, of the Bill of Rights, you know? 78 00:03:42,980 --> 00:03:46,800 A kid goes, what does these Bill of Rights mean? 79 00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:49,680 You can point them to the porn industry and show them, 80 00:03:49,680 --> 00:03:51,250 this is what the Bill of Rights are. 81 00:03:51,250 --> 00:03:55,300 These are why our Founding Fathers did what they did. 82 00:03:55,300 --> 00:03:58,750 Is so that we could sit in our own living rooms 83 00:03:58,750 --> 00:04:01,620 and masturbate to the movie of our choice, 84 00:04:01,620 --> 00:04:04,140 whether it be pornography or the Sound of Music. 85 00:04:04,140 --> 00:04:06,170 NARRATOR: In 1967, Saltzman broke 86 00:04:06,170 --> 00:04:09,730 pornography's color barrier with guess who's coming on dinner. 87 00:04:09,730 --> 00:04:13,340 It featured the industry's first interracial Dirty Sanchez. 88 00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:16,110 And in 1987, Mo buoyed up the spirits 89 00:04:16,110 --> 00:04:18,460 of the entire handicap porn community 90 00:04:18,460 --> 00:04:21,010 by directing Pile Driving Miss Daisy. 91 00:04:21,010 --> 00:04:22,300 Oh, you're so thick. 92 00:04:22,300 --> 00:04:24,800 NARRATOR: This was the first ever for the hearing impaired. 93 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:27,290 Fuck me! Fuck me! 94 00:04:27,290 --> 00:04:30,620 The handicapped porn consumer had largely been ignored. 95 00:04:30,620 --> 00:04:32,230 There was a little bit of amputee porn, 96 00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:33,720 the Stump Fucker Series. 97 00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:36,620 But if you were blind or a retard, 98 00:04:36,620 --> 00:04:38,710 where do you go for your porn? 99 00:04:38,710 --> 00:04:41,300 NARRATOR: In the '70s and -80s, Saltzman subtly tweaked 100 00:04:41,300 --> 00:04:44,730 the political establishment with his Pap Smears, 101 00:04:44,730 --> 00:04:47,470 political action pornos. 102 00:04:47,470 --> 00:04:51,990 The issues we're trying to address, like the environment, 103 00:04:51,990 --> 00:04:55,840 you know, we made a movie about the hole in the ozone layer. 104 00:04:55,840 --> 00:04:58,420 The ozone layer is a very important layer to have. 105 00:04:58,420 --> 00:05:00,020 And there shouldn't be a hole in it. 106 00:05:00,020 --> 00:05:00,880 [MUSIC PLAYING] 107 00:05:01,740 --> 00:05:02,740 Sweet. 108 00:05:02,740 --> 00:05:04,700 Yeah, I'll meet you at your place later, baby. 109 00:05:04,700 --> 00:05:06,750 That's right. All right. 110 00:05:06,750 --> 00:05:09,730 You just make sure that waterbed's nice and hot. 111 00:05:09,730 --> 00:05:10,430 Mitch. 112 00:05:10,430 --> 00:05:13,130 How could you? 113 00:05:13,130 --> 00:05:14,200 That's an aerosol cooking spray. 114 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:15,400 What, this? 115 00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:16,890 Busted. 116 00:05:16,890 --> 00:05:18,880 How do we turn Sheila on? 117 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:21,170 -Act locally, think globally. -Right. 118 00:05:21,170 --> 00:05:22,870 -Ow. -That's right. 119 00:05:22,870 --> 00:05:23,860 Shazam. 120 00:05:23,860 --> 00:05:24,870 Yes, yes. 121 00:05:24,870 --> 00:05:29,220 When Mo died in the spring of 2007, 122 00:05:29,220 --> 00:05:32,720 he left such a gaping hole in the porn industry. 123 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:36,110 Hundreds of porn stars had lost a beloved father figure. 124 00:05:36,110 --> 00:05:38,100 And porn fans across the world, they 125 00:05:38,100 --> 00:05:40,150 lost the thrill of ever seeing a new Mo 126 00:05:40,150 --> 00:05:41,880 Saltzman production again. 127 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:45,800 Until they found out there was one film left. 128 00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:51,180 Well I'd been working in Europe for the past couple years. 129 00:05:51,180 --> 00:05:53,860 So I was in Saint Tropez, directing 130 00:05:53,860 --> 00:05:59,380 second unit on a car campaign, when I heard about Mo's death. 131 00:05:59,380 --> 00:06:04,150 The next day a trunk arrives at my hotel. 132 00:06:04,150 --> 00:06:07,240 It was a steamer trunk of Mo's that the Estate 133 00:06:07,240 --> 00:06:08,450 had delivered to me. 134 00:06:08,450 --> 00:06:11,360 When I opened that trunk and saw what was inside, 135 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:13,540 it was one of those moments that you know your life 136 00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:15,260 will never be the same. 137 00:06:15,260 --> 00:06:18,660 It was a script called Dial M for Milkjugs, 138 00:06:18,660 --> 00:06:22,550 with storyboards, pages and pages of notes. 139 00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:25,600 It had been a project he'd been working on for years and years 140 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:26,930 and years, and wanted to make, and never 141 00:06:26,930 --> 00:06:28,530 got the chance to make. 142 00:06:28,530 --> 00:06:35,140 And it was in his will that if he passed before he 143 00:06:35,140 --> 00:06:38,870 got a chance to do it, that he wanted 144 00:06:38,870 --> 00:06:41,360 me to take over the project. 145 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:44,770 I quit my job the next day, flew back to the states, 146 00:06:44,770 --> 00:06:45,930 called everybody on the cast. 147 00:06:45,930 --> 00:06:47,800 They're all on board. 148 00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:50,780 It's going to star a dream team of porn superstars 149 00:06:50,780 --> 00:06:52,230 from across the generations. 150 00:06:52,230 --> 00:06:54,520 Everybody in the business wanted to be in this picture. 151 00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,290 But Mo hand-picked the cast himself. 152 00:06:56,290 --> 00:06:57,600 And he picked the best. 153 00:07:01,410 --> 00:07:03,040 NARRATOR: Coming out of retirement for this shoot 154 00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:04,910 will be Mo's favorite leading lady 155 00:07:04,910 --> 00:07:07,630 of the '70s, Lynette Kelly. 156 00:07:07,630 --> 00:07:11,120 A couple of friends and I went to see this Joe Cocker concert, 157 00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:14,260 and Mo Saltzman was there. 158 00:07:14,260 --> 00:07:17,670 And we began talking and sort of struck up 159 00:07:17,670 --> 00:07:19,330 an immediate friendship. 160 00:07:19,330 --> 00:07:22,620 And he invited me to watch them shoot the film 161 00:07:22,620 --> 00:07:24,040 that he was working on at the time, 162 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:26,010 which was COCK-A-Doodle-DON'T. 163 00:07:26,010 --> 00:07:29,940 I was impressed by how everyone was really Mo's family. 164 00:07:29,940 --> 00:07:33,700 I asked Mo right there how I could be a part of it. 165 00:07:33,700 --> 00:07:37,580 And so he put me in a scene with Bud Hurley. 166 00:07:37,580 --> 00:07:39,480 -Fuck. -Yeah. 167 00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:42,000 LYNETTE KELLY: Bud Hurley was the master. 168 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:47,860 He read your body like a blind man reads a novel. 169 00:07:47,860 --> 00:07:52,320 He could not only make you have an orgasm, 170 00:07:52,320 --> 00:07:58,470 but others watching it would have orgasms simultaneously. 171 00:07:58,470 --> 00:08:01,020 Most people don't get a chance to relive their youth, 172 00:08:01,020 --> 00:08:01,950 you know? 173 00:08:01,950 --> 00:08:03,010 But I'm getting that chance. 174 00:08:03,010 --> 00:08:05,080 And I just hope I'm up to it. 175 00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:07,790 It will be a different kind of project, obviously. 176 00:08:07,790 --> 00:08:09,770 It will be a boomer experience. 177 00:08:09,770 --> 00:08:15,480 And I hope maybe some of those boons will be sonic, you know? 178 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:17,800 I don't think it's a good idea. He's older. 179 00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:18,770 He's gained weight. 180 00:08:18,770 --> 00:08:20,870 His blood pressure is too high. 181 00:08:20,870 --> 00:08:22,250 And I worry about him. 182 00:08:22,250 --> 00:08:24,020 He gets winded. 183 00:08:24,020 --> 00:08:25,280 NARRATOR: In the '80s, Mo continued 184 00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:28,310 his political activism with films like Mr Gorbachev, 185 00:08:28,310 --> 00:08:29,590 Tear Down Those Pants. 186 00:08:29,590 --> 00:08:31,010 He also redefined the genre. 187 00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:34,920 He merged action adventure filmmaking and pornography. 188 00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:37,690 Doug and Debbie Vander Spiegel were his stars. 189 00:08:37,690 --> 00:08:38,670 [MUSIC PLAYING] 190 00:08:40,620 --> 00:08:42,630 Man's got to do what a man's got to do. 191 00:08:42,630 --> 00:08:44,130 -He's going to kill you. -Think so? 192 00:08:44,130 --> 00:08:44,920 [MUSIC PLAYING] 193 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:50,880 Let's go save some mathletes. 194 00:08:50,880 --> 00:08:52,570 Blue or red? -Red. 195 00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:55,920 [LOUD BEEPING TONE] 196 00:08:55,920 --> 00:08:57,830 God Bananaman, come on. 197 00:08:57,830 --> 00:08:59,760 Clear! 198 00:08:59,760 --> 00:09:00,730 Let's go. 199 00:09:00,730 --> 00:09:01,720 [MUSIC PLAYING] 200 00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:05,710 (SINGING): I don't know, but I been told. 201 00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:07,200 (SINGING): I don't know, but I been told. 202 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:08,990 (SINGING): Climb those rocks and share the load. 203 00:09:08,990 --> 00:09:14,470 Our work that we've created is all about building and working 204 00:09:14,470 --> 00:09:16,300 together, and teamwork. 205 00:09:16,300 --> 00:09:17,520 Share the load. 206 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:18,670 It's very simple. 207 00:09:18,670 --> 00:09:21,390 We worked so well together, and we wanted 208 00:09:21,390 --> 00:09:23,020 to pass that on to people. 209 00:09:23,020 --> 00:09:24,130 It's not about you taking it in. 210 00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:25,340 It's about them taking it in. 211 00:09:25,340 --> 00:09:27,880 -I've never been on this trail. -I don't give a shit. 212 00:09:27,880 --> 00:09:30,140 You know, when I first started out, 213 00:09:30,140 --> 00:09:33,740 I paving Mo's driveway, just for a couple extra bucks. 214 00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:36,470 That's hot work, working with tar. 215 00:09:36,470 --> 00:09:38,030 And he's like, you could do more. 216 00:09:38,030 --> 00:09:39,470 You could do a lot more. 217 00:09:39,470 --> 00:09:41,850 I've got a whole patio up here you can do. 218 00:09:41,850 --> 00:09:44,260 Mo really made me feel like I could live my dreams. 219 00:09:44,260 --> 00:09:48,230 And I didn't have to settle for less. 220 00:09:48,230 --> 00:09:49,650 I love Mo very much. 221 00:09:49,650 --> 00:09:52,330 And it was upsetting for me. 222 00:09:52,330 --> 00:09:55,630 At the same, of course I was thrilled to be a part of it. 223 00:09:55,630 --> 00:09:57,380 I mean, to be back in the saddle? 224 00:09:57,380 --> 00:09:58,230 Woo-hoo. 225 00:09:58,230 --> 00:09:59,240 I mean, wow. 226 00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:00,170 That's all I was thinking. 227 00:10:00,170 --> 00:10:03,090 I was like whoa, one more try, you know? 228 00:10:03,090 --> 00:10:07,600 Let this bronc out of the-- you know, out of the stable. 229 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:10,550 But I mean, you know, only in a professional way. 230 00:10:10,550 --> 00:10:12,190 NARRATOR: By the 1990's, porn fans 231 00:10:12,190 --> 00:10:14,220 we're demanding more three way action. 232 00:10:14,220 --> 00:10:16,610 And Mo rewarded them with a huge helping 233 00:10:16,610 --> 00:10:21,190 of his tag team superstars, Jerry and Marty Sphincter. 234 00:10:21,190 --> 00:10:21,950 [MUSIC PLAYING] 235 00:10:27,750 --> 00:10:30,150 It's been eight years since I've done a picture. 236 00:10:30,150 --> 00:10:32,450 You know, I just walked away. 237 00:10:32,450 --> 00:10:33,340 It's exciting, you know? 238 00:10:33,340 --> 00:10:37,460 I mean, I still feel-- I've got the equipment. 239 00:10:37,460 --> 00:10:39,130 You know it's still-- everything's functional. 240 00:10:39,130 --> 00:10:40,550 I still feel sexy. 241 00:10:40,550 --> 00:10:43,630 I still feel like I got it going on. 242 00:10:43,630 --> 00:10:48,360 And that's-- and that's exciting for me, to be able to-- to-- 243 00:10:50,480 --> 00:10:51,180 OK. 244 00:10:51,180 --> 00:10:52,960 Well that money's going to fall through now, because you 245 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:53,800 couldn't get me the deal. 246 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:54,800 How does that feel Jim? 247 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:56,660 Does that feel good? Yeah. 248 00:10:56,660 --> 00:10:58,550 So yeah, you're not going to have any money to make 249 00:10:58,550 --> 00:11:00,390 that deal in Century City. 250 00:11:00,390 --> 00:11:01,510 Right, you little motherfucker. 251 00:11:01,510 --> 00:11:02,320 Hold on one second. 252 00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:03,120 Where's my salad? 253 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:06,450 I changed my name to Marty Stevens 254 00:11:06,450 --> 00:11:09,780 when I realized that a name like Sphincter 255 00:11:09,780 --> 00:11:13,160 wasn't going to do me great in the business world. 256 00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:14,630 It was supposed to be here five minutes ago. 257 00:11:14,630 --> 00:11:15,450 Where's my salad? 258 00:11:15,450 --> 00:11:16,150 I did what you said. 259 00:11:16,150 --> 00:11:17,350 Get me my salad now. 260 00:11:17,350 --> 00:11:20,190 Salad now. 261 00:11:20,190 --> 00:11:21,530 NARRATOR: Growing up in Piscataway, 262 00:11:21,530 --> 00:11:25,730 New Jersey, Jerry and Marty were as close as brothers could be. 263 00:11:25,730 --> 00:11:28,460 In 1986 they rose to national prominence 264 00:11:28,460 --> 00:11:30,430 as champion high school cheerleaders, 265 00:11:30,430 --> 00:11:31,930 known for their spirited routines 266 00:11:31,930 --> 00:11:33,480 and their signature handshake. 267 00:11:33,480 --> 00:11:36,060 Psh, psh, ready, OK. 268 00:11:36,060 --> 00:11:37,490 NARRATOR: Mo saw one of these performances, 269 00:11:37,490 --> 00:11:39,720 and he immediately recognized their potential 270 00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:40,540 as a porn stars. 271 00:11:40,540 --> 00:11:41,310 Fuck. 272 00:11:41,310 --> 00:11:43,670 The day after Jerry and Marty graduated from high school, 273 00:11:43,670 --> 00:11:48,160 they appeared in their first porn together, Jew Sandwich. 274 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:50,980 The Sphincter Brothers went on to become the most influential 275 00:11:50,980 --> 00:11:54,630 tag team duo in porn history, until a tragic incident 276 00:11:54,630 --> 00:11:59,080 ripped them apart in 1999. 277 00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:01,600 It's been eight years since the incident. 278 00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:05,450 And it's been a long journey. 279 00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:08,510 I haven't seen my brother Marty in that time. 280 00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:10,110 And that's hard. 281 00:12:10,110 --> 00:12:11,830 I haven't seen Jerry in a long time. 282 00:12:11,830 --> 00:12:15,260 And I frankly don't need to see Jerry. 283 00:12:15,260 --> 00:12:19,190 Hollister called about the reunion movie, 284 00:12:19,190 --> 00:12:20,200 and you know what? 285 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,080 It was a great time when I did porn. 286 00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:24,030 And I loved all those characters. 287 00:12:24,030 --> 00:12:26,110 But we had our moment. 288 00:12:26,110 --> 00:12:27,880 I've moved on. 289 00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:30,020 It's just porn is not a part of my life anymore. 290 00:12:30,020 --> 00:12:32,480 And I hope-- I wish them all well. 291 00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:34,110 That's all I can say. 292 00:12:34,110 --> 00:12:35,090 God bless. 293 00:12:35,090 --> 00:12:39,740 I've called Marty a few times, a few times a week. 294 00:12:39,740 --> 00:12:41,730 And I haven't heard back. 295 00:12:41,730 --> 00:12:43,750 And it's been about four years now. 296 00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:47,040 But I'm composing a letter. 297 00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:48,280 And I'm trying to put all my thoughts 298 00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:50,540 down on paper for him to read. 299 00:12:50,540 --> 00:12:54,430 My hope is that it'll hit him somewhere deep, 300 00:12:54,430 --> 00:12:55,500 and he'll show up for the shoot. 301 00:12:58,150 --> 00:12:58,980 Maybe get some closure. 302 00:12:58,980 --> 00:12:59,960 [MUSIC PLAYING] 303 00:13:06,340 --> 00:13:07,850 Could you make it out to Doug please? 304 00:13:07,850 --> 00:13:09,320 All right. Doug, you a big fan? 305 00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:10,090 Yes ma'am. 306 00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:12,520 I'm really excited about the signing today, 307 00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:16,290 because it's my-- 308 00:13:16,290 --> 00:13:17,470 Anus and vagina. 309 00:13:17,470 --> 00:13:18,420 Yeah. 310 00:13:18,420 --> 00:13:20,510 And 4 and 1/2 inches of taint. 311 00:13:20,510 --> 00:13:22,120 Mwah. -All right. 312 00:13:22,120 --> 00:13:23,430 You head downstairs mister. 313 00:13:23,430 --> 00:13:25,040 A committed fan deserves an ass. 314 00:13:25,040 --> 00:13:26,420 NARRATOR: As a new century dawned, 315 00:13:26,420 --> 00:13:29,870 Mo introduced what critics would later call the anal explosion. 316 00:13:29,870 --> 00:13:31,750 His series of anal themed films made 317 00:13:31,750 --> 00:13:33,930 Whitney Sweet a household name. 318 00:13:33,930 --> 00:13:34,660 Rub it. 319 00:13:34,660 --> 00:13:35,490 I love you. 320 00:13:35,490 --> 00:13:36,740 Rub it. 321 00:13:36,740 --> 00:13:37,680 Hey, hello. 322 00:13:37,680 --> 00:13:39,260 You are fucking awesome. 323 00:13:39,260 --> 00:13:40,590 I do the job to you all the time. 324 00:13:40,590 --> 00:13:43,490 Nothing I do is gratuitous. 325 00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:45,400 She's very classy. 326 00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:47,330 Very conservative up to this point. 327 00:13:47,330 --> 00:13:48,400 Yeah. 328 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:51,180 You know, if it's in the ass, it isn't in another hole 329 00:13:51,180 --> 00:13:52,690 at the same time. 330 00:13:52,690 --> 00:13:55,390 When she works on this project, it's going to skyrocket 331 00:13:55,390 --> 00:13:56,480 her into a new place, OK? 332 00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:58,970 She's going to be starting by doing her very first number 333 00:13:58,970 --> 00:14:03,320 one, numero uno, lesbian scene. 334 00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,960 She's going to be working with Hallie Lujah, who is the number 335 00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,390 deux woman in the industry. 336 00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:11,470 My job as her manager is more to shape her career. 337 00:14:11,470 --> 00:14:14,060 And the way I've been shaping it is 338 00:14:14,060 --> 00:14:17,190 more into the ambiguously legal stuff, you know? 339 00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:21,450 So, you know, the girl who's been stood up on prom night, 340 00:14:21,450 --> 00:14:25,160 like, who's voted for the first time. 341 00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:25,910 Anything else? 342 00:14:25,910 --> 00:14:28,200 While I have done the sleepover and we get in a pillow fight. 343 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:32,290 And then, oh, that last one I did was 16. 344 00:14:32,290 --> 00:14:32,990 Of course. 345 00:14:32,990 --> 00:14:34,300 Driver's license. 346 00:14:34,300 --> 00:14:35,320 That was really, really funny. 347 00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:36,200 That was exciting, yeah. 348 00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:37,670 -Suck your thumb again. -Yeah. 349 00:14:37,670 --> 00:14:38,850 That's what she does best. 350 00:14:38,850 --> 00:14:41,240 I've really enjoyed working with Gretchen, 351 00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:45,120 because I feel like Gretchen understands 352 00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:48,030 what it's like to be a man. -Thanks a lot. 353 00:14:48,030 --> 00:14:48,730 Keep it moving. 354 00:14:48,730 --> 00:14:51,570 And I understand what it's like to be a woman. 355 00:14:51,570 --> 00:14:52,970 -I'm Carrie. -Gretchen. 356 00:14:52,970 --> 00:14:53,800 I'm Gretchen. 357 00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:55,280 I got a little flustered. 358 00:14:55,280 --> 00:15:00,920 And so what's gone into this strange marriage of a shemale 359 00:15:00,920 --> 00:15:05,010 and a female in business-- 360 00:15:05,010 --> 00:15:07,480 Let me put it this way. 361 00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:08,410 I work in business. 362 00:15:08,410 --> 00:15:12,220 I know what it's like to be fucked up the ass. 363 00:15:12,220 --> 00:15:13,720 And so does she. 364 00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:15,210 Well it's hard to believe, but Mo Saltzman 365 00:15:15,210 --> 00:15:19,050 never won a Peevie Award. 366 00:15:19,050 --> 00:15:22,730 Now it's one of my personal goals to get Mo a Peevie. 367 00:15:22,730 --> 00:15:25,230 The deadline for submissions is in 10 days. 368 00:15:25,230 --> 00:15:27,220 But that will not be a problem, because we 369 00:15:27,220 --> 00:15:30,660 have the best producers in the business, the best of the best. 370 00:15:30,660 --> 00:15:32,490 -You're doing great. -Just show me again. 371 00:15:32,490 --> 00:15:33,910 Just do it again. -Sweetie, look. 372 00:15:33,910 --> 00:15:36,460 NARRATOR: Life partners Ted Haynes and Andre Cox will 373 00:15:36,460 --> 00:15:41,120 be producing in the 1990s they starred in a series of wildly 374 00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:42,890 original homoerotic films. 375 00:15:42,890 --> 00:15:47,610 Titles as varied as The Crack of Dawn, Taste of Seth, 376 00:15:47,610 --> 00:15:49,370 and of course, Howard's End. 377 00:15:49,370 --> 00:15:51,750 We decided to have a baby about two years ago, 378 00:15:51,750 --> 00:15:53,060 and we did a computer progression 379 00:15:53,060 --> 00:15:54,940 of what one could look like if we 380 00:15:54,940 --> 00:15:56,290 actually could mix our genes. 381 00:15:56,290 --> 00:15:57,100 Which you can't. 382 00:15:57,100 --> 00:15:59,000 But the computer progression is-- 383 00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:00,650 it looked strangely looked like Charles 384 00:16:00,650 --> 00:16:02,860 Nelson Reilly or Kevin Costner. 385 00:16:02,860 --> 00:16:04,160 It was weird. 386 00:16:04,160 --> 00:16:05,990 I'm pulling for Costner, personally. 387 00:16:05,990 --> 00:16:06,990 Yeah, hello. 388 00:16:06,990 --> 00:16:08,580 But with Charles Nelson Reilly's talent. 389 00:16:08,580 --> 00:16:10,790 Put that phone down or I'll break your leg. 390 00:16:10,790 --> 00:16:14,090 Mac Hollister called us, and he said he had the script. 391 00:16:14,090 --> 00:16:16,260 Ted's grandmother luckily left him some money, 392 00:16:16,260 --> 00:16:18,900 so getting the money together was actually pretty easy. 393 00:16:18,900 --> 00:16:22,730 And it's so exciting. 394 00:16:22,730 --> 00:16:24,380 We're casting our bread upon the water, 395 00:16:24,380 --> 00:16:26,190 and it's going to come back 100-fold. 396 00:16:26,190 --> 00:16:29,580 And hopefully not come back as soggy bread. 397 00:16:29,580 --> 00:16:31,060 [MUSIC PLAYING] 398 00:16:46,450 --> 00:16:50,030 Andre and I just saw your last film. 399 00:16:50,030 --> 00:16:51,470 Your clitoris is adorable. -Thanks. 400 00:16:51,470 --> 00:16:52,310 Did-- do you know Tiki? 401 00:16:52,310 --> 00:16:53,730 No, hi. Mac Hollister. 402 00:16:53,730 --> 00:16:55,730 She is the mother of my third kid. 403 00:16:55,730 --> 00:16:56,740 Oh, how wonderful. 404 00:16:56,740 --> 00:16:58,350 -And fifth. -And fifth. 405 00:16:58,350 --> 00:16:59,370 And fith. 406 00:16:59,370 --> 00:17:02,350 I'm sorry. 407 00:17:02,350 --> 00:17:03,570 Have you met your co-star? 408 00:17:03,570 --> 00:17:04,930 Hi. 409 00:17:04,930 --> 00:17:05,890 -Hey. -Hi. 410 00:17:05,890 --> 00:17:07,620 -How about that, our two stars. -It's so-- 411 00:17:07,620 --> 00:17:09,140 -My hand's in my hair. -OK. 412 00:17:09,140 --> 00:17:09,890 Got it, got it. 413 00:17:09,890 --> 00:17:10,590 Hi Oliver. 414 00:17:10,590 --> 00:17:11,440 How are you? 415 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:12,840 Good to see you. -Hi Gretchen. 416 00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:14,570 Your necklace is so beautiful. It's-- 417 00:17:14,570 --> 00:17:15,290 Oh, hey. 418 00:17:15,290 --> 00:17:16,770 -What's wrong? -Oh. 419 00:17:16,770 --> 00:17:18,990 Don't touch it, or maybe look at it. 420 00:17:18,990 --> 00:17:19,990 It's a synergy wave pendant. 421 00:17:19,990 --> 00:17:21,930 Synergy. 422 00:17:21,930 --> 00:17:23,710 It is so beautiful. 423 00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:25,420 It was the anal beads of the first pope. 424 00:17:25,420 --> 00:17:26,460 -That's what you told. -Really? 425 00:17:26,460 --> 00:17:27,900 So that's what we think it was. 426 00:17:27,900 --> 00:17:28,860 [MUSIC PLAYING] 427 00:17:31,750 --> 00:17:32,810 Mac. 428 00:17:32,810 --> 00:17:33,900 Oh. 429 00:17:33,900 --> 00:17:36,450 Oh Mac, it's so good to see you. 430 00:17:36,450 --> 00:17:38,150 -Hey. -Oh my gosh. 431 00:17:38,150 --> 00:17:40,110 Yeah. Yeah. 432 00:17:40,110 --> 00:17:43,150 Oh it's so good to see you. Jerry. 433 00:17:43,150 --> 00:17:44,670 Jerry Sphincter. -Jerry, oh my God. 434 00:17:44,670 --> 00:17:45,370 Jerry. 435 00:17:45,370 --> 00:17:47,800 Bam, bam, somebody's been doing pilates. 436 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:49,200 -A little bit. -Yeah. 437 00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:50,010 And the ball. 438 00:17:50,010 --> 00:17:51,560 I do a lot of stuff on the ball. 439 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:53,610 Listen, have you-- have you seen Marty? 440 00:17:53,610 --> 00:17:54,490 Is he coming today? 441 00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:56,050 I haven't heard back from him. -Yeah. 442 00:17:56,050 --> 00:17:56,830 Oh yeah. 443 00:17:56,830 --> 00:17:57,990 He'll definitely be here. 444 00:17:57,990 --> 00:17:59,610 He's definitely in though. You guys have-- 445 00:17:59,610 --> 00:18:00,380 Oh he's in. 446 00:18:00,380 --> 00:18:01,080 OK. 447 00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:01,780 Good. 448 00:18:01,780 --> 00:18:02,640 We didn't talk today. 449 00:18:02,640 --> 00:18:04,320 But sure, he's-- I think he's just busy with work. 450 00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:05,670 Oh, OK. Sure. 451 00:18:05,670 --> 00:18:07,290 Great to have that old Sphincter magic. 452 00:18:07,290 --> 00:18:08,380 That's what I'm thinking. 453 00:18:08,380 --> 00:18:09,280 Very exciting. 454 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:11,490 Listen, you might want to lose the beard though. 455 00:18:11,490 --> 00:18:12,220 OK. 456 00:18:12,220 --> 00:18:14,170 Love it. -The girls. 457 00:18:14,170 --> 00:18:15,550 First gay scene, huh? 458 00:18:15,550 --> 00:18:16,250 Mhm. 459 00:18:16,250 --> 00:18:17,580 She got her asshole bleached special. 460 00:18:17,580 --> 00:18:18,790 Fantastic. 461 00:18:18,790 --> 00:18:20,520 It's an expensive process. Do you know-- 462 00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:21,520 Well just submit the receipt. 463 00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:22,370 ---what they do for that? 464 00:18:22,370 --> 00:18:24,930 They spread and they go in there. 465 00:18:24,930 --> 00:18:26,330 They go in there. I've never seen-- 466 00:18:26,330 --> 00:18:27,300 Have you ever had it done? 467 00:18:27,300 --> 00:18:28,700 -Oh heck no. -No? 468 00:18:28,700 --> 00:18:30,710 Heck no. I like it furry. 469 00:18:30,710 --> 00:18:32,550 The whole range. 470 00:18:32,550 --> 00:18:34,180 It's like, you know, like I have a whole skunk 471 00:18:34,180 --> 00:18:35,780 sitting on my pelvis. 472 00:18:35,780 --> 00:18:36,830 You know what I mean? 473 00:18:36,830 --> 00:18:38,700 NARRATOR: Rounding out this remarkable cast 474 00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:41,070 will be legendary dominatrix, Furious 475 00:18:41,070 --> 00:18:44,430 Georgia, and world-renowned sissy, Carl Munson. 476 00:18:44,430 --> 00:18:45,930 Thank you. 477 00:18:45,930 --> 00:18:47,990 NARRATOR: Jake Storm, inventor of the grudge fudge 478 00:18:47,990 --> 00:18:49,150 and the donkey punch. 479 00:18:49,150 --> 00:18:50,060 Words. 480 00:18:50,060 --> 00:18:51,130 Words are funny. 481 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:51,830 Hey. 482 00:18:51,830 --> 00:18:53,090 All you bastards, I'm here. 483 00:18:53,090 --> 00:18:55,090 So let's party. 484 00:18:55,090 --> 00:18:59,670 NARRATOR: And of course, Roger Hogman, the loutish '80s porn 485 00:18:59,670 --> 00:19:02,270 star and practical joker who was famous for leaving 486 00:19:02,270 --> 00:19:05,740 sperm deposits in various foods for his coworkers to find. 487 00:19:08,410 --> 00:19:09,750 Hey Roger, how you doing? 488 00:19:09,750 --> 00:19:11,230 Hey, get lost, freak show. 489 00:19:11,230 --> 00:19:13,700 Hey, how about you, huh? 490 00:19:13,700 --> 00:19:15,400 Thank you all for coming and being a part 491 00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:16,970 of this fantastic project. 492 00:19:16,970 --> 00:19:19,650 It's really a labor of love. -It is, yes. 493 00:19:19,650 --> 00:19:22,330 And if God made the universe and everything in six days, 494 00:19:22,330 --> 00:19:24,010 then we can make this a Peevie Award 495 00:19:24,010 --> 00:19:25,350 winning film in six to eight. 496 00:19:25,350 --> 00:19:28,040 So let's go ahead, and let's shoot a big one for Mo. 497 00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:28,950 For Mo! 498 00:19:28,950 --> 00:19:29,930 [MUSIC PLAYING] 499 00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:50,680 NARRATOR: Mo shot well over 2,511 films in his home 500 00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:52,740 in the San Fernando Valley, which was affectionately 501 00:19:52,740 --> 00:19:54,140 known as the Love Shack. 502 00:19:54,140 --> 00:19:57,290 Man, if God wanted to create the perfect porno house, 503 00:19:57,290 --> 00:19:58,320 this was it. 504 00:19:58,320 --> 00:20:00,670 It has eight bedrooms, four hot tubs, three dungeons, 505 00:20:00,670 --> 00:20:03,130 a classroom, a locker room, a Turkish prison, an Afghani 506 00:20:03,130 --> 00:20:05,620 interrogation room, a pew room, a douche room, and enema room, 507 00:20:05,620 --> 00:20:06,970 an operating room, a petting zoo, 508 00:20:06,970 --> 00:20:11,660 and most importantly, Mo's spirit schmeared all over. 509 00:20:11,660 --> 00:20:13,430 Family's always been very important to me, you know? 510 00:20:13,430 --> 00:20:18,330 And I think I've created a family here at the Love Shack, 511 00:20:18,330 --> 00:20:21,040 you know? I consider us all a family. 512 00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:22,240 It's a different kind of family. 513 00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:26,290 It's a family that has sex with each other, 514 00:20:26,290 --> 00:20:27,690 and puts it on film. 515 00:20:27,690 --> 00:20:29,890 OK, listen everybody. 516 00:20:29,890 --> 00:20:32,300 AF Barnes gave us a great little script here. 517 00:20:32,300 --> 00:20:34,010 And let's see what we can do with it. 518 00:20:34,010 --> 00:20:37,660 Not everybody's here, but we're just going to have to go. 519 00:20:37,660 --> 00:20:42,540 Interior, Bjorkland Manor, main salon, day. 520 00:20:42,540 --> 00:20:45,030 The sound of thundering hoofsteps 521 00:20:45,030 --> 00:20:49,160 builds, and constables Magnus Bjornson and Anika 522 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:52,280 Thornquist Bjornson storm in. 523 00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:53,900 Ladies and gentlemen, calm down. 524 00:20:53,900 --> 00:20:54,650 What's happening? 525 00:20:54,650 --> 00:20:55,650 Silence. 526 00:20:55,650 --> 00:20:58,460 And all will be explained. -The script? 527 00:20:58,460 --> 00:20:59,700 Yeah, I know the script. 528 00:20:59,700 --> 00:21:01,630 I saw the script when it was being passed around Hollywood 529 00:21:01,630 --> 00:21:03,620 ten years ago, and it's a joke. 530 00:21:03,620 --> 00:21:04,880 Want to hear the premise? 531 00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:06,120 OK. 532 00:21:06,120 --> 00:21:08,040 A bunch of Swedish aristocrats gather 533 00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:09,400 at the end of the Second World War 534 00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:13,200 to debate Sweden's neutrality. OK? 535 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:14,770 You hard yet? 536 00:21:14,770 --> 00:21:19,050 There's been an [INAUDIBLE]. 537 00:21:19,050 --> 00:21:20,190 Everyone gasps. 538 00:21:20,190 --> 00:21:22,680 That's right, a murder. 539 00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:24,420 Secretary Blomquist is dead. 540 00:21:24,420 --> 00:21:26,280 And everyone in this room is suspect. 541 00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:27,840 -What? -Who? 542 00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:29,070 What are you talking about? 543 00:21:29,070 --> 00:21:30,610 Suspect. 544 00:21:30,610 --> 00:21:33,540 And you, Ula, the Secretary's paramour, 545 00:21:33,540 --> 00:21:35,690 cast asunder when he reconciled with his wife, 546 00:21:35,690 --> 00:21:37,830 might it have been you? 547 00:21:37,830 --> 00:21:39,750 It's true, I loved him. 548 00:21:39,750 --> 00:21:41,430 -What the fuck is she doing? -OK, OK. 549 00:21:41,430 --> 00:21:44,450 Oh, I'm sorry. I thought I was playing Ula. 550 00:21:44,450 --> 00:21:45,620 OK, well you thought wrong. 551 00:21:45,620 --> 00:21:46,590 No, see, because? 552 00:21:46,590 --> 00:21:47,820 We've been rehearsing for two weeks. 553 00:21:47,820 --> 00:21:49,410 -Yeah, I-- -When there's Ula words-- 554 00:21:49,410 --> 00:21:50,360 That's her. ---I read them. 555 00:21:50,360 --> 00:21:53,440 When there's other words that don't matter to me, 556 00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:54,180 you read them. 557 00:21:54,180 --> 00:21:55,380 Wait, wait, what the hell is going? 558 00:21:55,380 --> 00:21:56,610 My client is playing Ula. 559 00:21:56,610 --> 00:21:57,460 Oh, are you getting up? 560 00:21:57,460 --> 00:21:59,290 First of all, this is blinking at me. 561 00:21:59,290 --> 00:22:00,800 So I can't really-- -Whoa, guys, guys. 562 00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:01,500 [INTERPOSING VOICES] 563 00:22:03,300 --> 00:22:05,030 The agents, sit down. 564 00:22:05,030 --> 00:22:06,920 You're not playing Ula, we're playing Ula. 565 00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:08,300 I'm sorry guys, where are you? 566 00:22:08,300 --> 00:22:09,590 My client is playing Ula, all right? 567 00:22:09,590 --> 00:22:11,410 We already had this covered in contractual meetings. 568 00:22:11,410 --> 00:22:13,350 I'm sorry that you were not informed. 569 00:22:13,350 --> 00:22:14,740 I always wanted to be an agent. 570 00:22:14,740 --> 00:22:17,270 Now I'm my own shark in my own pool. 571 00:22:17,270 --> 00:22:20,380 And it's salt water, baby. 572 00:22:20,380 --> 00:22:21,710 You know what those are? Shark teeth. 573 00:22:21,710 --> 00:22:22,970 We're walking. Come on, let's go. 574 00:22:22,970 --> 00:22:23,800 Oliver, Oliver-- 575 00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:25,130 No, let's go. 576 00:22:25,130 --> 00:22:26,050 ---Oliver, Ollie! 577 00:22:26,050 --> 00:22:27,430 Sit down. 578 00:22:27,430 --> 00:22:29,270 OK. 579 00:22:29,270 --> 00:22:31,220 This is so silly. 580 00:22:31,220 --> 00:22:32,080 Whitney, you play Ula. 581 00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:33,830 Because you're the star. -Thank you. 582 00:22:33,830 --> 00:22:35,380 So you're Ula. 583 00:22:35,380 --> 00:22:37,180 Elsa, got it. 584 00:22:37,180 --> 00:22:38,120 That's all right. 585 00:22:38,120 --> 00:22:40,050 Let's continue, please. 586 00:22:40,050 --> 00:22:42,030 You have no right to detain us. 587 00:22:42,030 --> 00:22:42,960 No, that's not your part. 588 00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:44,490 You have to read Ula's part now. 589 00:22:44,490 --> 00:22:45,420 It's true. 590 00:22:45,420 --> 00:22:49,960 I loved him once, but now my love belongs to another. 591 00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:54,020 Just then, Ula grabs Elsa and jackknifes 592 00:22:54,020 --> 00:22:58,500 into a reverse cowgirl with a Sri Lankan half twist. 593 00:22:58,500 --> 00:23:01,840 Lars enters, pees on Brigetta. 594 00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:05,430 Then Elsa corkscrews into a slow motion Lassie 595 00:23:05,430 --> 00:23:08,480 Come Home and roasts Sigvard's chestnuts 596 00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:10,720 with an $8 Jiffy Lube. 597 00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:12,920 That's going to be such a great scene. 598 00:23:12,920 --> 00:23:14,410 [MUSIC PLAYING] 599 00:23:36,820 --> 00:23:39,840 Do you hear that? 600 00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:42,000 Better question. 601 00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,570 Do you feel that? 602 00:23:44,570 --> 00:23:49,680 The French call it melange trois. 603 00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:50,850 It's an angel passes over. 604 00:23:50,850 --> 00:23:51,840 This is the moment. 605 00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:53,130 I tend to get here a couple hours 606 00:23:53,130 --> 00:23:54,490 early just so I can soak it in. 607 00:23:54,490 --> 00:23:57,690 Have a cup of coffee, shine up the dildos, get my belt ready. 608 00:23:57,690 --> 00:23:58,610 It's religious. 609 00:23:58,610 --> 00:23:59,910 It's what we do. 610 00:23:59,910 --> 00:24:02,640 I would say making love, the act of making love, 611 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:05,410 is probably as close as we get to touching God. 612 00:24:05,410 --> 00:24:06,400 [MUSIC PLAYING] 613 00:24:07,890 --> 00:24:08,890 [MOANING] 614 00:24:15,470 --> 00:24:16,810 Wow. Wow, that's great. 615 00:24:16,810 --> 00:24:18,010 That's great. Hey, let's try something. 616 00:24:18,010 --> 00:24:19,980 Are you familiar with the films of Ingmar Bergman? 617 00:24:19,980 --> 00:24:21,080 -Yeah, of course. -Great. 618 00:24:21,080 --> 00:24:22,310 Think Swedish too. Give me a little-- 619 00:24:22,310 --> 00:24:23,800 Swedish? ---Swedish thing. 620 00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:24,500 [MOANING IN SWEDISH] 621 00:24:26,590 --> 00:24:28,630 OK. So then I get down on my knees. 622 00:24:28,630 --> 00:24:29,540 And I whip down my pants. 623 00:24:29,540 --> 00:24:32,490 And I say oh Magnus, you're so big. 624 00:24:32,490 --> 00:24:34,820 Slurp, spit, gag. -Oh yeah, baby. 625 00:24:34,820 --> 00:24:36,300 Right there. 626 00:24:36,300 --> 00:24:37,770 [MOANING IN UNISON] 627 00:24:37,770 --> 00:24:38,760 Slurp, spit, gag. 628 00:24:38,760 --> 00:24:40,420 OK baby, are you ready for the hot beef 629 00:24:40,420 --> 00:24:42,050 inject-- I don't feel that's right. 630 00:24:42,050 --> 00:24:43,220 I don't think I would ask. 631 00:24:43,220 --> 00:24:44,280 Wait, what's the matter? 632 00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:44,990 It's just that line. 633 00:24:44,990 --> 00:24:46,270 It's like, if I'm such a great detective, 634 00:24:46,270 --> 00:24:47,800 why would I ask you if you're ready for the hot beef 635 00:24:47,800 --> 00:24:48,330 injection? 636 00:24:48,330 --> 00:24:49,500 Why wouldn't I have seduced that? 637 00:24:49,500 --> 00:24:50,440 OK. Are you kidding? 638 00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:51,160 No. 639 00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:51,990 Like, just let me try it. 640 00:24:51,990 --> 00:24:53,480 Let me try it a different way. 641 00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:54,480 You are now ready. 642 00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:56,200 You are now-- you are ready-- you 643 00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:59,160 are ready now for the hot-- you are now ready for the hot beef 644 00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:00,820 injection. [MUSIC PLAYING] 645 00:25:05,640 --> 00:25:07,660 Doug and Debbie were it. 646 00:25:07,660 --> 00:25:10,100 We all wanted to be one or the other of them. 647 00:25:10,100 --> 00:25:13,060 They were gorgeous, devoted, hot. 648 00:25:13,060 --> 00:25:15,890 And they made it work, year in and year out. 649 00:25:15,890 --> 00:25:17,740 Pretty-- it was pretty amazing. 650 00:25:17,740 --> 00:25:19,890 Thank you guys so much for all the silver. 651 00:25:19,890 --> 00:25:22,030 And although we said no gifts, we really-- well, 652 00:25:22,030 --> 00:25:22,990 frankly, we appreciate it. 653 00:25:22,990 --> 00:25:23,850 Oh absolutely. 654 00:25:23,850 --> 00:25:25,770 We're definitely going to hang on to that silverware. 655 00:25:25,770 --> 00:25:28,630 Maybe we'll even use it. I'm serious. 656 00:25:28,630 --> 00:25:30,370 We're probably going to sell it. 657 00:25:30,370 --> 00:25:33,970 Hey, it's hard for two porn stars have a relationship man. 658 00:25:33,970 --> 00:25:35,370 I mean, your first date's in a fuck swing. 659 00:25:35,370 --> 00:25:38,620 Where are you going to go but down, OK? 660 00:25:38,620 --> 00:25:40,050 Off the top of my head I can think of three 661 00:25:40,050 --> 00:25:41,130 relationships that worked. 662 00:25:41,130 --> 00:25:44,270 In the '30s, Three Ball O'Brien and Dust Bowl Daisy Adams. 663 00:25:44,270 --> 00:25:46,870 In the '60s, Tush Bushman and Urethra Franklin. 664 00:25:46,870 --> 00:25:49,890 And in the '80s, Doug and Debbie Vanderspiegl. 665 00:25:49,890 --> 00:25:51,160 And the jury's still out on them. 666 00:25:51,160 --> 00:25:52,500 You are now ready for the hot beef injection. 667 00:25:52,500 --> 00:25:53,190 You're kidding. You've got to be kidding. 668 00:25:53,190 --> 00:25:56,110 You are-- are you ready now for the-- no, once again. 669 00:25:56,110 --> 00:25:56,810 Are you ready-- 670 00:25:56,810 --> 00:25:58,340 Oh would you just say the fucking line? 671 00:25:58,340 --> 00:25:58,960 -I am. -Just saying the fucking line. 672 00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:00,320 I'm trying to say the line. 673 00:26:00,320 --> 00:26:02,210 God I'm working on something here, OK? 674 00:26:02,210 --> 00:26:03,790 You know, just because I'm forcing 675 00:26:03,790 --> 00:26:06,110 you to have oral sex does not mean I'm not a real person. 676 00:26:09,220 --> 00:26:10,030 Oh hi. 677 00:26:10,030 --> 00:26:13,590 Marty Stevens please. 678 00:26:13,590 --> 00:26:15,160 This is his brother Jerry calling again. 679 00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:18,130 I just wanted to see if he was going to be-- OK, yeah, 680 00:26:18,130 --> 00:26:19,400 I'll hold. 681 00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:21,820 I feel blessed, you know? 682 00:26:21,820 --> 00:26:23,270 I'm healthy, I'm young. 683 00:26:23,270 --> 00:26:24,440 I don't want to brag, but you know, 684 00:26:24,440 --> 00:26:28,890 I've got a pretty nice sized, you know, apartment. 685 00:26:28,890 --> 00:26:30,930 And so when I look at Jerry, you know, 686 00:26:30,930 --> 00:26:32,680 I mean it's been eight years since the incidence. 687 00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:35,150 And he's still in so much pain. 688 00:26:35,150 --> 00:26:36,590 I'm just praying Marty shows up. 689 00:26:36,590 --> 00:26:40,750 Because Jerry needs it big time, you know? 690 00:26:40,750 --> 00:26:44,160 It just kills me. 691 00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:45,790 Jerry also needs a bath. 692 00:26:45,790 --> 00:26:48,130 I used to write you all these letters. 693 00:26:48,130 --> 00:26:49,540 Did you ever get them? 694 00:26:49,540 --> 00:26:50,490 Um. 695 00:26:50,490 --> 00:26:52,390 I was like your biggest fan. 696 00:26:52,390 --> 00:26:55,390 And I got your headshot back with a little signature. 697 00:26:55,390 --> 00:26:56,820 Oh. Wow. 698 00:26:56,820 --> 00:26:59,700 You sound really lonely. -No, not at all. 699 00:26:59,700 --> 00:27:02,340 I just-- well now that we're filming together, 700 00:27:02,340 --> 00:27:04,190 I thought we could be like sisters or something. 701 00:27:04,190 --> 00:27:06,240 Because we're going to get so close. 702 00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:07,190 Oh. Yeah. 703 00:27:07,190 --> 00:27:09,980 Maybe we could go for a waxing. 704 00:27:09,980 --> 00:27:12,470 Oh. 705 00:27:12,470 --> 00:27:13,780 Are you Greek? 706 00:27:13,780 --> 00:27:18,600 You know, Whitney's a little bit different than I expected. 707 00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:21,970 A little bit meaner. 708 00:27:21,970 --> 00:27:26,990 And kind of anti-Greek, so-- but you know, 709 00:27:26,990 --> 00:27:28,680 I'm not going to stoop to her level. 710 00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:29,890 I'm just not. 711 00:27:29,890 --> 00:27:32,860 Does it ever hurt your feelings that no one, you know, 712 00:27:32,860 --> 00:27:36,830 wants to have sex with you from the front? 713 00:27:36,830 --> 00:27:39,020 MO SALTZMAN: My great grandfather, 714 00:27:39,020 --> 00:27:43,230 he made a feature in the-- it was 1897, 715 00:27:43,230 --> 00:27:46,250 called Cousin Myrtle Blows a Kiss. 716 00:27:46,250 --> 00:27:48,270 I was shown this movie at a very young age. 717 00:27:48,270 --> 00:27:50,420 And I wanted to make my own movies. 718 00:27:50,420 --> 00:27:53,370 And that's how I got the bug for it. 719 00:27:53,370 --> 00:27:57,700 I was so inspired I hung a production still 720 00:27:57,700 --> 00:28:00,400 from Cousin Myrtle on the wall of the Love Shack. 721 00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:03,610 And I look at it for inspiration before every shoot. 722 00:28:03,610 --> 00:28:04,590 [MUSIC PLAYING] 723 00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:17,370 Pretty girl pictures are stills that we use for the internet, 724 00:28:17,370 --> 00:28:21,380 the DVD box covers, VHS box covers, merch. 725 00:28:21,380 --> 00:28:23,450 It's probably one of my favorite parts of the job, 726 00:28:23,450 --> 00:28:25,210 you know, try to catch the actresses 727 00:28:25,210 --> 00:28:27,260 before they get all juicy. 728 00:28:27,260 --> 00:28:28,660 Could you get closer? 729 00:28:28,660 --> 00:28:31,200 I want this to say what, what, what. 730 00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:31,900 What? 731 00:28:31,900 --> 00:28:34,070 You are just one big mole, aren't you? 732 00:28:34,070 --> 00:28:36,060 What, what what? 733 00:28:36,060 --> 00:28:38,040 Can I see your butt? 734 00:28:38,040 --> 00:28:39,740 Not yours. 735 00:28:39,740 --> 00:28:41,150 Sweet. [MUSIC PLAYING] 736 00:28:46,440 --> 00:28:48,230 I'm king of the world. 737 00:28:48,230 --> 00:28:50,440 Hogman, can I actually have you get out this shot? 738 00:28:50,440 --> 00:28:51,130 Ow. 739 00:28:55,640 --> 00:28:57,410 Great. Yeah, yeah, that's good. 740 00:28:57,410 --> 00:28:58,110 That's good. 741 00:29:01,290 --> 00:29:02,550 Hogman! 742 00:29:02,550 --> 00:29:04,070 Bang, bang, buddy. 743 00:29:04,070 --> 00:29:05,370 Bang, bang, yeah. 744 00:29:08,170 --> 00:29:09,590 Any cum on your vegetables? 745 00:29:09,590 --> 00:29:10,720 Ned, take a break. 746 00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:11,850 OK. 747 00:29:11,850 --> 00:29:13,910 Because I'm not going to pay for that. 748 00:29:13,910 --> 00:29:16,270 No, I am not going to pay you for pink flagstone 749 00:29:16,270 --> 00:29:18,480 when I ordered grey flagstone. 750 00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:21,110 Because I specifically remember ordering. 751 00:29:21,110 --> 00:29:22,310 Oh, OK, that's the problem. 752 00:29:22,310 --> 00:29:23,950 You answer to me from now on, all right? 753 00:29:23,950 --> 00:29:25,000 You don't answer to Doug. 754 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:26,100 You answer to me, Debbie. 755 00:29:26,100 --> 00:29:27,570 It all started two years ago. 756 00:29:27,570 --> 00:29:30,220 We decided to do an addition to the house. 757 00:29:30,220 --> 00:29:31,620 It was going to be really simple. 758 00:29:31,620 --> 00:29:32,890 We were going to add an office, a home 759 00:29:32,890 --> 00:29:34,930 office so people didn't have to go through our house 760 00:29:34,930 --> 00:29:36,810 to consult with. 761 00:29:36,810 --> 00:29:38,480 And then Doug got his hands on it. 762 00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:40,470 I wanted to give her her own space. 763 00:29:40,470 --> 00:29:42,140 I basically wanted to be like Winston Churchill 764 00:29:42,140 --> 00:29:43,450 when he went to India. 765 00:29:43,450 --> 00:29:45,810 I wanted to build her a Taj Mahal. 766 00:29:45,810 --> 00:29:47,350 And then he came up with more ideas. 767 00:29:47,350 --> 00:29:48,750 And then he came up with the idea of well, 768 00:29:48,750 --> 00:29:51,180 if we have more clients, we need a bigger garage. 769 00:29:51,180 --> 00:29:53,680 And why don't we make an octagonal garage? 770 00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:56,860 So I tore it down and I put in eight sides. 771 00:29:56,860 --> 00:29:58,410 Which is a bitch. 772 00:29:58,410 --> 00:29:59,770 That was Jose Luis just right there. 773 00:29:59,770 --> 00:30:00,570 That was Jose Luis. 774 00:30:00,570 --> 00:30:02,390 He's taking over the job. -All right. 775 00:30:02,390 --> 00:30:04,290 Wait. I have one question for you. 776 00:30:04,290 --> 00:30:05,170 Come on. 777 00:30:05,170 --> 00:30:06,120 And that is, why? 778 00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:08,050 -Because you're inept, OK? -I'm adept? 779 00:30:08,050 --> 00:30:09,140 That's a good thing. I'm adept. 780 00:30:09,140 --> 00:30:11,490 No, inept. Not adept. 781 00:30:11,490 --> 00:30:14,370 And then I got on this thing about not 782 00:30:14,370 --> 00:30:18,590 using gasoline powered vehicles to move things. 783 00:30:18,590 --> 00:30:20,940 And I hired some mules. 784 00:30:20,940 --> 00:30:23,870 Then one of the mules died, which set me back. 785 00:30:23,870 --> 00:30:26,750 Mules are very sensitive to the heat. 786 00:30:26,750 --> 00:30:28,500 And I thought they always used them in the desert, 787 00:30:28,500 --> 00:30:31,280 so I thought, you know, maybe they were like a camel. 788 00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:32,680 But they're not like a camel. 789 00:30:32,680 --> 00:30:35,410 A camel and a mule are entirely different things. 790 00:30:35,410 --> 00:30:36,930 Point is, it became too much. 791 00:30:36,930 --> 00:30:38,520 And I was overwhelmed. 792 00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:40,790 The cost was skyrocketing. 793 00:30:40,790 --> 00:30:42,230 We started fighting all the time, 794 00:30:42,230 --> 00:30:43,830 because we didn't have the money. 795 00:30:43,830 --> 00:30:48,590 So we're getting a divorce. 796 00:30:48,590 --> 00:30:51,210 This movie's going to be our last experience together. 797 00:30:54,920 --> 00:30:57,400 And that'll be that. 798 00:30:57,400 --> 00:31:01,330 The heart is not a resilient muscle. 799 00:31:01,330 --> 00:31:03,050 Or the heart is the most resilient muscle. 800 00:31:05,790 --> 00:31:07,610 I guess we'll find out. 801 00:31:07,610 --> 00:31:09,040 We're so glad to have you with us. 802 00:31:09,040 --> 00:31:09,740 Oh I'm flattered. 803 00:31:09,740 --> 00:31:11,010 It's like the old days, isn't it? 804 00:31:11,010 --> 00:31:11,990 Absolutely. 805 00:31:11,990 --> 00:31:14,450 It's a shame Mo's not here. 806 00:31:14,450 --> 00:31:15,930 [MUSIC PLAYING] 807 00:31:29,140 --> 00:31:29,840 Hi. 808 00:31:32,320 --> 00:31:33,020 You're here. 809 00:31:33,020 --> 00:31:34,440 Help me out. 810 00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:35,240 Bud and Lynette? 811 00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:36,790 They're more than inspirations. 812 00:31:36,790 --> 00:31:38,630 They're like icons. 813 00:31:38,630 --> 00:31:40,780 I want to get a piece of that. 814 00:31:40,780 --> 00:31:41,480 Say again? 815 00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:42,610 So I'm excited. 816 00:31:42,610 --> 00:31:45,580 But it's tempered with the fact that I might have to throw up. 817 00:31:45,580 --> 00:31:47,190 So-- [MOANING] 818 00:31:50,830 --> 00:31:51,940 Bud yes. 819 00:31:51,940 --> 00:31:52,690 Right there. 820 00:31:52,690 --> 00:31:54,120 Your knees are grinding into my pacemaker. 821 00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:55,090 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 822 00:31:55,090 --> 00:31:56,060 [MOANING AND SCREAMING] 823 00:32:18,530 --> 00:32:19,230 God. 824 00:32:24,710 --> 00:32:25,700 [CRYING] 825 00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:36,590 [APPLAUSE] 826 00:32:39,130 --> 00:32:39,850 I still have chills. 827 00:32:39,850 --> 00:32:41,470 It's like the adrenaline's still pumping through me. 828 00:32:41,470 --> 00:32:42,190 Bud and Lynette. 829 00:32:42,190 --> 00:32:44,930 Who would've thought, after 30 years apart. 830 00:32:44,930 --> 00:32:46,220 We've got a picture here. 831 00:32:46,220 --> 00:32:47,750 We've got a picture on our hands. 832 00:32:47,750 --> 00:32:49,300 All right, let's go, let's go. 833 00:32:49,300 --> 00:32:50,520 Do we have a picture on our hands. 834 00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:51,060 Oh my God. -Break it down. 835 00:32:51,060 --> 00:32:52,080 Let me call my mom. 836 00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:52,850 It's unbelievable. 837 00:32:52,850 --> 00:32:54,180 That Peevie is as good as ours. 838 00:32:54,180 --> 00:32:57,150 I don't want to jinx it, but I can feel it. 839 00:32:57,150 --> 00:32:58,870 I can feel it, you know? 840 00:33:01,550 --> 00:33:02,650 Really made a mess of the place. 841 00:33:05,300 --> 00:33:06,640 What I'm doing now is I'm going through 842 00:33:06,640 --> 00:33:09,030 and I'm bagging and tagging. 843 00:33:09,030 --> 00:33:10,550 That's industry jargon. 844 00:33:10,550 --> 00:33:13,110 Basically anything used on a porn set 845 00:33:13,110 --> 00:33:16,470 can be sold on the internet for mucho dinero. 846 00:33:16,470 --> 00:33:17,750 Oh, we have a bogie. 847 00:33:17,750 --> 00:33:22,290 Seen worn, Bud Hurley thong. 848 00:33:22,290 --> 00:33:23,540 Oh dude, this'll get at least 2,000. 849 00:33:23,540 --> 00:33:24,270 Are you kidding? 850 00:33:24,270 --> 00:33:26,840 2,500. 851 00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:29,290 Last night, when I said I went for a walk to clear my head? 852 00:33:29,290 --> 00:33:30,010 Yes, my darling. 853 00:33:30,010 --> 00:33:32,870 I was really with Ernst in the vestibule. 854 00:33:32,870 --> 00:33:34,050 Secretary Blonquist? 855 00:33:34,050 --> 00:33:35,460 I can explain. 856 00:33:35,460 --> 00:33:38,060 Like hell you can, you insensitive whore. 857 00:33:38,060 --> 00:33:40,330 Oh my God, is that Marty? 858 00:33:40,330 --> 00:33:41,290 [MUSIC PLAYING] 859 00:33:48,950 --> 00:33:51,320 Jerry? 860 00:33:51,320 --> 00:33:54,000 Jer, you look-- you look like a Jewish Bee-Gee. 861 00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:55,450 You're here. 862 00:33:55,450 --> 00:33:57,800 What's with your hair? 863 00:33:57,800 --> 00:33:59,370 You know, I wasn't going to come to this thing. 864 00:33:59,370 --> 00:34:02,940 But Jerry wrote me this letter-- it was pathetic-- about how 865 00:34:02,940 --> 00:34:04,040 much he needed me. 866 00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:07,080 And so I thought I'd come in and save him once again. 867 00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:09,090 I mean, that's ostensibly why I'm here. 868 00:34:09,090 --> 00:34:12,440 But Mo's Estate's going to have to be owned by somebody. 869 00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:14,890 And I figured I'd get in on the ground floor, 870 00:34:14,890 --> 00:34:16,420 if you know what I'm saying. 871 00:34:16,420 --> 00:34:17,710 Good to see you. 872 00:34:17,710 --> 00:34:19,250 My brother Marty's here! 873 00:34:19,250 --> 00:34:20,360 What's with the hair? 874 00:34:20,360 --> 00:34:23,270 There's a very short list of cultural and historical events 875 00:34:23,270 --> 00:34:26,620 that have such impact, such resonance throughout society, 876 00:34:26,620 --> 00:34:29,250 that everybody remembers exactly where they were when they 877 00:34:29,250 --> 00:34:31,160 first heard about that event. 878 00:34:31,160 --> 00:34:33,320 And I think that right up on that list 879 00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:38,690 would be November 22nd, 1999, on the set 880 00:34:38,690 --> 00:34:40,930 of a Rock and a Hard Place. 881 00:34:40,930 --> 00:34:46,050 All we really know is that in a routine double penetration 882 00:34:46,050 --> 00:34:55,720 scene, Jerry and Marty Sphincter accidentally touched tips. 883 00:34:55,720 --> 00:34:57,270 This was a maneuver that they'd done before. 884 00:34:57,270 --> 00:35:01,490 They'd done it 100 times, 1,000 times, maybe a million times. 885 00:35:01,490 --> 00:35:03,600 Nothing had ever happened. 886 00:35:03,600 --> 00:35:07,780 And that collision was later the subject 887 00:35:07,780 --> 00:35:14,400 of a documentary, Six Seconds in Reseda, an American Tragedy. 888 00:35:14,400 --> 00:35:15,880 NARRATOR: To the naked eye, the scene 889 00:35:15,880 --> 00:35:17,850 appears to go off flawlessly. 890 00:35:17,850 --> 00:35:19,980 But slow the footage down, and the images 891 00:35:19,980 --> 00:35:22,530 tell quite a different story. 892 00:35:22,530 --> 00:35:26,100 Frame 75, Jerry and Marty begin performing 893 00:35:26,100 --> 00:35:29,980 the standard double pork roast, with Jerry assuming position 894 00:35:29,980 --> 00:35:34,540 two, of the classic cowgirl poses, while Marty punishes 895 00:35:34,540 --> 00:35:38,310 La Cienagas anus from behind. 896 00:35:38,310 --> 00:35:42,210 Frame 123, Marty instigates the signature handshake. 897 00:35:45,660 --> 00:35:47,710 Jerry counters with a move that made him 898 00:35:47,710 --> 00:35:51,970 famous, the bunny ears. 899 00:35:51,970 --> 00:35:55,300 Frame 228, La Cienaga moves to unleash 900 00:35:55,300 --> 00:35:58,290 her massive dirty pillows, setting off 901 00:35:58,290 --> 00:36:00,460 a disastrous chain of events. 902 00:36:00,460 --> 00:36:04,700 Frame 273, Mary leans 45 degrees to his right 903 00:36:04,700 --> 00:36:09,900 and thrusts just as Frame 291, Jerry thrusts 904 00:36:09,900 --> 00:36:11,840 back and to the left. 905 00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:13,990 Back and to the left. 906 00:36:13,990 --> 00:36:16,190 Back and to the left. 907 00:36:16,190 --> 00:36:17,990 Back and to the left. 908 00:36:17,990 --> 00:36:20,350 Frame 301. 909 00:36:20,350 --> 00:36:22,760 Oh dear God. 910 00:36:22,760 --> 00:36:24,960 NARRATOR: Impact. 911 00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:25,760 [UNINTELLIGIBLE MOANING] 912 00:36:37,130 --> 00:36:37,830 Help me. 913 00:36:54,550 --> 00:36:57,180 It affected me deeply because we had just 914 00:36:57,180 --> 00:37:01,090 lost a really wonderful presence in the adult entertainment 915 00:37:01,090 --> 00:37:02,310 industry, you know? 916 00:37:02,310 --> 00:37:04,620 Lots of people can screw on camera. 917 00:37:04,620 --> 00:37:06,490 But very few people can make it sing, 918 00:37:06,490 --> 00:37:09,760 and really just have a smooth, easy flow, it seems natural, 919 00:37:09,760 --> 00:37:11,070 it seems very free. 920 00:37:11,070 --> 00:37:13,280 You know, it's like Yo-Yo Ma versus the next guy 921 00:37:13,280 --> 00:37:14,070 who plays cello. 922 00:37:14,070 --> 00:37:16,120 I mean these guys were good. 923 00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:20,810 I remember exactly where I was when the brothers touched tips. 924 00:37:20,810 --> 00:37:24,800 I was doing a karaoke, a regional championship round, 925 00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:27,230 in Dickinson, North Dakota. 926 00:37:27,230 --> 00:37:29,210 I was doing a Johnny Cash set. 927 00:37:29,210 --> 00:37:33,060 And it threw me off, threw me off my game, 928 00:37:33,060 --> 00:37:34,410 when I heard about that. 929 00:37:34,410 --> 00:37:38,510 I actually came in sixth out of seven contests. 930 00:37:38,510 --> 00:37:41,450 You know, people say I'm shallow. 931 00:37:41,450 --> 00:37:42,680 I've been through shit in my life. 932 00:37:42,680 --> 00:37:43,660 I've been through heavy shit. 933 00:37:43,660 --> 00:37:45,390 When I was eight years old I was diagnosed 934 00:37:45,390 --> 00:37:48,260 with a rare immune deficiency syndrome, OK? 935 00:37:48,260 --> 00:37:50,920 I spent the next eight years in a plastic bubble, 936 00:37:50,920 --> 00:37:52,600 no human contact. 937 00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:55,190 Cut to my 17th birthday, turns out I was misdiagnosed. 938 00:37:55,190 --> 00:37:57,140 I was just allergic to shellfish. 939 00:37:57,140 --> 00:37:58,930 So that was a pisser. 940 00:37:58,930 --> 00:38:04,790 But the only day I ever cried was 941 00:38:04,790 --> 00:38:07,430 the day I heard the Sphincter brothers touched tips. 942 00:38:07,430 --> 00:38:12,630 I don't remember a lot of what happened right after. 943 00:38:12,630 --> 00:38:14,600 I think I had some sort of break. 944 00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:17,960 Some sort of psychotic episode. I floated. 945 00:38:17,960 --> 00:38:21,530 I was in a fugue sort of mist. 946 00:38:21,530 --> 00:38:25,380 But finally I found myself in a cult, the Order of Pegasus. 947 00:38:25,380 --> 00:38:26,470 And it was very intense for me. 948 00:38:26,470 --> 00:38:29,220 And I found a family in those people. 949 00:38:29,220 --> 00:38:34,820 And we had created a suicide pact. 950 00:38:34,820 --> 00:38:37,250 And unfortunately that morning I had a flat tire on my bike. 951 00:38:37,250 --> 00:38:38,650 So I missed that event. 952 00:38:38,650 --> 00:38:40,160 But it was there that I discovered 953 00:38:40,160 --> 00:38:41,670 the six stages of grief. 954 00:38:41,670 --> 00:38:44,840 You know, you start off with complete denial. 955 00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:45,610 It never happened. 956 00:38:45,610 --> 00:38:47,800 And then the rage comes, number two. 957 00:38:47,800 --> 00:38:49,270 Number three is the bargaining, which 958 00:38:49,270 --> 00:38:50,860 I didn't really understand. 959 00:38:50,860 --> 00:38:51,960 It was very confusing to me. 960 00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:56,040 So I went up to four for a while, which is depression. 961 00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:57,140 But who wants to be depressed? 962 00:38:57,140 --> 00:39:00,250 So I went back to one for a little while and just denied. 963 00:39:00,250 --> 00:39:03,230 And then I doubled down, had to hit two again. 964 00:39:03,230 --> 00:39:05,710 Jumped up to five, which is accepting, which I'm 965 00:39:05,710 --> 00:39:09,200 sort of trying to embrace now. 966 00:39:09,200 --> 00:39:11,960 And of course banjo, the last. 967 00:39:11,960 --> 00:39:16,650 Marty's obviously stuck in one, with a little bit of two 968 00:39:16,650 --> 00:39:19,150 and just a dash of four. 969 00:39:19,150 --> 00:39:22,730 But I think he'll come around if he-- I think he's 970 00:39:22,730 --> 00:39:24,490 coming around. 971 00:39:24,490 --> 00:39:25,900 Rock and a Hard Place. 972 00:39:25,900 --> 00:39:26,770 Rock and a Hard Place. 973 00:39:31,970 --> 00:39:34,750 No, don't remember it. Sorry. 974 00:39:34,750 --> 00:39:36,950 Who was in that? 975 00:39:36,950 --> 00:39:39,040 And move that please. 976 00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:43,130 This is the scene where they've come to the Jacuzzi 977 00:39:43,130 --> 00:39:43,880 to celebrate. 978 00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:48,250 This is kind of a big, big moment for us in the picture. 979 00:39:48,250 --> 00:39:49,630 And I know that these two are going 980 00:39:49,630 --> 00:39:51,570 to deliver a hot scene for us. 981 00:39:51,570 --> 00:39:52,760 Let me find my center. 982 00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:55,420 Everyone keeps asking, is it going to be weird to have sex 983 00:39:55,420 --> 00:39:57,460 with someone you're divorcing? -I'm beautiful. 984 00:39:57,460 --> 00:39:58,500 And I have a secret. 985 00:39:58,500 --> 00:40:00,550 And I gotta say no. 986 00:40:00,550 --> 00:40:01,670 It's not weird at all. Right? 987 00:40:01,670 --> 00:40:03,230 Oh no, no, no. Absolutely. 988 00:40:03,230 --> 00:40:04,310 100% normal. 989 00:40:04,310 --> 00:40:05,010 Well look. 990 00:40:05,010 --> 00:40:07,180 In this industry you get paid to have sex. 991 00:40:07,180 --> 00:40:09,330 So sometimes you have to have sex with someone you 992 00:40:09,330 --> 00:40:10,970 can barely stand to look at. -Right. 993 00:40:10,970 --> 00:40:13,380 Or someone you find totally repugnant, 994 00:40:13,380 --> 00:40:16,450 both morally and physically. 995 00:40:16,450 --> 00:40:17,960 And action. 996 00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:21,380 I was thinking that maybe we could celebrate. 997 00:40:21,380 --> 00:40:22,920 Ah. 998 00:40:22,920 --> 00:40:24,900 We're on the same page. 999 00:40:24,900 --> 00:40:25,850 Ow! 1000 00:40:25,850 --> 00:40:27,270 What? 1001 00:40:27,270 --> 00:40:28,110 Nothing. 1002 00:40:28,110 --> 00:40:29,890 Why don't we-- fuck. 1003 00:40:29,890 --> 00:40:31,020 Oh, are you trying to hit my hat? 1004 00:40:31,020 --> 00:40:32,600 No, I'm not trying to hit your hat. 1005 00:40:32,600 --> 00:40:34,850 If I wanted to hit your hat I would do this. 1006 00:40:34,850 --> 00:40:36,280 Hey. Oh great. 1007 00:40:36,280 --> 00:40:37,230 Now I'm not in character. 1008 00:40:37,230 --> 00:40:38,040 [HALFHEARTED MOANING] 1009 00:40:40,470 --> 00:40:41,680 Are you kidding me? 1010 00:40:41,680 --> 00:40:43,010 What? 1011 00:40:43,010 --> 00:40:43,990 It's hard. 1012 00:40:43,990 --> 00:40:45,660 It's not hard, that's the point. 1013 00:40:45,660 --> 00:40:46,890 I'm having shrinkage issues. 1014 00:40:46,890 --> 00:40:48,400 -Do you need a little-- -No, I'm good. 1015 00:40:48,400 --> 00:40:50,400 Do you need a little tweak or something down there? 1016 00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:51,380 -Oh my God. -Can you help him out ? 1017 00:40:51,380 --> 00:40:52,440 -Yeah, all right. -Can we get this thing going? 1018 00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:53,470 That was good by the way. 1019 00:40:53,470 --> 00:40:56,000 I thought maybe now we could celebrate. 1020 00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:58,220 Mm. 1021 00:40:58,220 --> 00:41:00,810 Well hip, hip, hooray. 1022 00:41:00,810 --> 00:41:02,210 Ow. Ow. 1023 00:41:02,210 --> 00:41:02,990 What are-- -What? 1024 00:41:02,990 --> 00:41:04,220 What are you trying to do, drown me? 1025 00:41:04,220 --> 00:41:05,090 -What? -Goddammit. 1026 00:41:05,090 --> 00:41:06,640 I'm trying to get some glamour. 1027 00:41:06,640 --> 00:41:07,560 [SCREAMING] 1028 00:41:08,950 --> 00:41:09,930 So you're married, huh? 1029 00:41:09,930 --> 00:41:11,190 Yeah, she's amazing. 1030 00:41:11,190 --> 00:41:12,960 I'm sorry I couldn't invite you to the wedding. 1031 00:41:12,960 --> 00:41:14,810 But it was a small affair, just like 400 1032 00:41:14,810 --> 00:41:16,250 people at the Bel Air Hotel. 1033 00:41:16,250 --> 00:41:16,950 It was great. 1034 00:41:16,950 --> 00:41:18,330 Are you guys thinking about kids? 1035 00:41:18,330 --> 00:41:19,380 Actually we have a kid. 1036 00:41:19,380 --> 00:41:21,350 -You have a child? -Yeah. 1037 00:41:21,350 --> 00:41:23,570 Beautiful girl. Her name is Leila. 1038 00:41:23,570 --> 00:41:25,530 You-- I have a niece named Leila. 1039 00:41:25,530 --> 00:41:26,230 Yeah. 1040 00:41:26,230 --> 00:41:27,890 Oh, I should tell her about you. 1041 00:41:27,890 --> 00:41:30,460 Jerry's ass is a good ass. 1042 00:41:30,460 --> 00:41:34,810 It's just very hairy. 1043 00:41:34,810 --> 00:41:38,390 So it has to be dealt with by me. 1044 00:41:38,390 --> 00:41:41,050 Oh sweet Jesus. 1045 00:41:41,050 --> 00:41:42,900 It needs the special clippers. 1046 00:41:42,900 --> 00:41:46,240 Stasha, we need the 517 immediately. 1047 00:41:46,240 --> 00:41:49,340 It's a different kind of blade that they use for horses. 1048 00:41:49,340 --> 00:41:51,130 What about you? What have you been up to? 1049 00:41:51,130 --> 00:41:52,270 -OK. -I'm doing great. 1050 00:41:52,270 --> 00:41:53,220 I found out-- easy there. 1051 00:41:53,220 --> 00:41:54,250 -There you go. -Easy Kitty. 1052 00:41:54,250 --> 00:41:55,120 Spread them a little bit. 1053 00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:59,370 I found a buyer for my kidney, so I'm working out that deal. 1054 00:41:59,370 --> 00:42:00,070 No mom. 1055 00:42:00,070 --> 00:42:04,070 I'm not bringing anyone home for Yom Kippur. 1056 00:42:04,070 --> 00:42:06,970 Because it's not a festive holiday, that's why. 1057 00:42:06,970 --> 00:42:09,630 Ma, people don't even eat. 1058 00:42:09,630 --> 00:42:11,970 You know, well I find it depressing. 1059 00:42:11,970 --> 00:42:14,400 Can I talk to dad about this please? 1060 00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:15,100 You know what? 1061 00:42:15,100 --> 00:42:16,590 I'm sorry, I've got to call you back. 1062 00:42:16,590 --> 00:42:18,510 -Gretchen, my-- -What? 1063 00:42:18,510 --> 00:42:20,280 What? -My synergy wave pendant. 1064 00:42:20,280 --> 00:42:21,840 My synergy wave pendant's gone. -Your pendant? 1065 00:42:21,840 --> 00:42:23,300 It's gone. It's gone. 1066 00:42:23,300 --> 00:42:24,100 Where did you leave it? 1067 00:42:24,100 --> 00:42:25,420 Where did you put it? 1068 00:42:25,420 --> 00:42:28,830 The last time I had it I was wearing it. 1069 00:42:28,830 --> 00:42:31,040 And that zip-a-dee-doo-dah was looking at it. 1070 00:42:31,040 --> 00:42:31,740 And she-- 1071 00:42:31,740 --> 00:42:33,790 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, Hallie? 1072 00:42:33,790 --> 00:42:35,110 -Yes. -Oh wait, is she-- 1073 00:42:35,110 --> 00:42:36,570 -She had-- -I can't randomly accuse-- 1074 00:42:36,570 --> 00:42:37,670 She stole it. ---someone. 1075 00:42:37,670 --> 00:42:39,200 She stole it. It's not random. 1076 00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:40,320 It's not random. 1077 00:42:40,320 --> 00:42:41,750 Are you sure, because if you're not sure-- 1078 00:42:41,750 --> 00:42:42,510 Gretchen I'm so sure. 1079 00:42:42,510 --> 00:42:44,790 There are two things that I am more 1080 00:42:44,790 --> 00:42:47,330 sure of than anything else. 1081 00:42:47,330 --> 00:42:48,960 OK, what? 1082 00:42:48,960 --> 00:42:55,090 One is, you are going to find a man. 1083 00:42:55,090 --> 00:43:02,520 And the second thing is, Hallie Lujah took my pendant. 1084 00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:04,960 And I need it back. 1085 00:43:08,380 --> 00:43:10,350 I'll take care of it. 1086 00:43:10,350 --> 00:43:13,040 So I'm like, you've got your schnitzel in my strudel. 1087 00:43:13,040 --> 00:43:14,530 -I love your accent. -Yeah. 1088 00:43:14,530 --> 00:43:15,840 -It's fantastic. -OK. 1089 00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:17,100 So I'll come in to this. 1090 00:43:17,100 --> 00:43:18,240 So you're down first? 1091 00:43:18,240 --> 00:43:19,720 You come on top of me. 1092 00:43:19,720 --> 00:43:21,220 OK, so I'm in the back, right? 1093 00:43:21,220 --> 00:43:22,640 -This is our specialty. -Awesome. 1094 00:43:22,640 --> 00:43:22,880 OK. 1095 00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:23,880 And then I'm going like this. 1096 00:43:23,880 --> 00:43:24,580 I get under, right? 1097 00:43:24,580 --> 00:43:26,230 -You come in here somewhere. -I've got it. 1098 00:43:26,230 --> 00:43:27,550 Let me just get under. -This is great. 1099 00:43:27,550 --> 00:43:28,230 -OK, so-- -Ow. 1100 00:43:28,230 --> 00:43:28,940 Oh, you know what? Hold on. 1101 00:43:28,940 --> 00:43:30,330 One second. -Wait just a second. 1102 00:43:30,330 --> 00:43:32,270 -Hold on. -Hey. 1103 00:43:32,270 --> 00:43:32,970 -Hey. -You OK? 1104 00:43:32,970 --> 00:43:34,310 -Yeah. -This is going to work well. 1105 00:43:34,310 --> 00:43:35,080 -OK, so then-- -Can you just give me a minute? 1106 00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:36,170 One second. I'll be right back. 1107 00:43:36,170 --> 00:43:36,870 No, no. 1108 00:43:39,520 --> 00:43:40,220 All right. 1109 00:43:40,220 --> 00:43:41,910 We're just going to stay on sticks for this. 1110 00:43:41,910 --> 00:43:43,340 Hollister, can I talk to you for a minute? 1111 00:43:43,340 --> 00:43:45,170 Yeah Marty. What is it? 1112 00:43:45,170 --> 00:43:48,350 I can't shoot today. 1113 00:43:48,350 --> 00:43:49,250 Well I need you today. 1114 00:43:49,250 --> 00:43:52,180 -Why can't you shoot today? -It's Shabbos. 1115 00:43:56,090 --> 00:43:58,870 Shabbos? Marty it's Tuesday. 1116 00:43:58,870 --> 00:44:00,870 This whole Marty things really freaking me out man. 1117 00:44:00,870 --> 00:44:06,170 It's like he's so in denial that he can't even 1118 00:44:06,170 --> 00:44:07,260 admit the whole thing happened. 1119 00:44:07,260 --> 00:44:08,500 He has no recollection of it. 1120 00:44:08,500 --> 00:44:11,000 It's like OJ Simpson, you know? 1121 00:44:11,000 --> 00:44:12,150 I watched an interview with him. 1122 00:44:12,150 --> 00:44:13,910 And it's like, he can't even remember 1123 00:44:13,910 --> 00:44:15,790 he ever even played football. 1124 00:44:18,630 --> 00:44:20,010 What kind of toothpaste do you use? 1125 00:44:20,010 --> 00:44:21,730 Crest. 1126 00:44:21,730 --> 00:44:23,350 Have you ever shaved all your body hair? 1127 00:44:23,350 --> 00:44:24,820 Yes, I have. 1128 00:44:24,820 --> 00:44:28,020 When I first meet the actor, I do like to take a history. 1129 00:44:28,020 --> 00:44:28,970 I'll make notes. 1130 00:44:28,970 --> 00:44:30,530 I have questionnaires, you know, are 1131 00:44:30,530 --> 00:44:32,900 your parents married, divorced. 1132 00:44:32,900 --> 00:44:35,240 If they were spanked as children. 1133 00:44:35,240 --> 00:44:36,740 Great. Fantastic. 1134 00:44:36,740 --> 00:44:38,300 Because it makes my job so much easier. 1135 00:44:38,300 --> 00:44:40,150 Have you ever played hangman? 1136 00:44:40,150 --> 00:44:41,910 Yes, I have. 1137 00:44:41,910 --> 00:44:43,370 Guess a letter. 1138 00:44:43,370 --> 00:44:45,520 -G. -Nope. 1139 00:44:45,520 --> 00:44:46,220 OK. 1140 00:44:46,220 --> 00:44:47,860 This is one of my favorite scenes, Whitney. 1141 00:44:47,860 --> 00:44:49,380 This is where we establish Ula as this 1142 00:44:49,380 --> 00:44:53,970 really sensuous being through her baking the lingonberry pie. 1143 00:44:53,970 --> 00:44:55,770 You've made a pie crust before? 1144 00:44:55,770 --> 00:44:57,640 Ollie, Ollie! 1145 00:44:57,640 --> 00:44:59,790 This is lost! 1146 00:44:59,790 --> 00:45:01,050 Whitney! 1147 00:45:01,050 --> 00:45:02,320 That is outrageous, what you've done. 1148 00:45:02,320 --> 00:45:04,600 Hey, hey, what is outrageous? 1149 00:45:04,600 --> 00:45:06,240 You put superglue in our mascara. 1150 00:45:06,240 --> 00:45:07,680 I beg your pardon? 1151 00:45:07,680 --> 00:45:08,640 I beg your pardon. 1152 00:45:08,640 --> 00:45:10,110 Why would she put superglue in her mascara? 1153 00:45:10,110 --> 00:45:12,280 Whitney, why would you put superglue in my mascara? 1154 00:45:12,280 --> 00:45:13,130 I didn't. 1155 00:45:13,130 --> 00:45:14,600 She wouldn't put superglue in your mascara. 1156 00:45:14,600 --> 00:45:16,650 But if I did, maybe it was to get back at you 1157 00:45:16,650 --> 00:45:18,750 for stealing my synergy wave pendant. 1158 00:45:18,750 --> 00:45:20,940 But I didn't put superglue in, what is it? 1159 00:45:20,940 --> 00:45:23,550 Listen, we gave you Ula. 1160 00:45:23,550 --> 00:45:24,270 That's enough. 1161 00:45:24,270 --> 00:45:26,380 Well maybe you put superglue in your own mascara. 1162 00:45:26,380 --> 00:45:27,580 Get the on set medic. 1163 00:45:27,580 --> 00:45:29,590 It's burning, it's burning. 1164 00:45:29,590 --> 00:45:31,590 It's OK. 1165 00:45:31,590 --> 00:45:32,770 We're going to the emergency room. 1166 00:45:32,770 --> 00:45:33,550 Come on. 1167 00:45:33,550 --> 00:45:34,580 I'm extremely disappointed. 1168 00:45:34,580 --> 00:45:37,630 And I don't mind telling you. -Really? 1169 00:45:37,630 --> 00:45:39,680 I thought it worked great. 1170 00:45:39,680 --> 00:45:41,290 Anyway, back to the scene. 1171 00:45:41,290 --> 00:45:42,090 Did you-- 1172 00:45:42,090 --> 00:45:45,930 The whole pie-- listen-- the pie, the pie, the pie baking 1173 00:45:45,930 --> 00:45:49,010 thing with the, with the-- 1174 00:45:49,010 --> 00:45:52,030 NARRATOR: In the 1980's, no porn director enjoyed more success 1175 00:45:52,030 --> 00:45:53,550 than Mac Hollister. 1176 00:45:53,550 --> 00:45:57,590 He was the industry's golden boy, the Spielberg of smut. 1177 00:45:57,590 --> 00:45:59,210 The Lucas of the lube. 1178 00:45:59,210 --> 00:46:02,330 But then he made a crucial error in judgment. 1179 00:46:02,330 --> 00:46:05,460 In 1988 Hollister directed Fondling Fathers, 1180 00:46:05,460 --> 00:46:08,860 a 12 hour gay porn set at the Constitutional Convention. 1181 00:46:08,860 --> 00:46:11,330 And outside of a few pleasantly surprised 1182 00:46:11,330 --> 00:46:14,950 constitutional scholars and a closet Federalist, no one 1183 00:46:14,950 --> 00:46:15,920 went to see it. 1184 00:46:15,920 --> 00:46:18,720 Fondling Fathers collapsed like no movie 1185 00:46:18,720 --> 00:46:20,460 has ever collapsed, OK? 1186 00:46:20,460 --> 00:46:23,200 It cost $500,000 and grossed a buck and a half. 1187 00:46:23,200 --> 00:46:25,870 And he went into a major depression, OK? 1188 00:46:25,870 --> 00:46:26,690 He did not pass go. 1189 00:46:26,690 --> 00:46:28,080 He did not collect $200. 1190 00:46:28,080 --> 00:46:30,950 He went home and he started eating. 1191 00:46:30,950 --> 00:46:33,680 After a month he gained 10 pounds. 1192 00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:36,380 After a year he was up to 563 pounds. 1193 00:46:36,380 --> 00:46:38,410 I mean, who's going to hire the guy? 1194 00:46:38,410 --> 00:46:40,860 I don't know what he's been doing for work. 1195 00:46:40,860 --> 00:46:41,960 Action. 1196 00:46:41,960 --> 00:46:44,900 No one on the Hillside Heaters could believe their eyes. 1197 00:46:44,900 --> 00:46:47,780 Spencer, a right handed hitter who wore the number six, 1198 00:46:47,780 --> 00:46:50,530 was paralyzed from the waist down. 1199 00:46:50,530 --> 00:46:53,800 But as he rolled his wheelchair into the batter's box-- 1200 00:46:53,800 --> 00:46:54,500 Cut! 1201 00:46:54,500 --> 00:46:56,630 That's the worst reading I've ever heard. 1202 00:46:56,630 --> 00:46:58,150 What the fuck was that? 1203 00:46:58,150 --> 00:46:59,120 [CAR ENGINE] 1204 00:47:09,390 --> 00:47:11,440 He says he's been directing commercials and Europe 1205 00:47:11,440 --> 00:47:13,380 for the last 10 years? 1206 00:47:13,380 --> 00:47:16,920 Yeah, he's been in his mom's garage for the last 10 years, 1207 00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:17,620 on an allowance. 1208 00:47:17,620 --> 00:47:18,950 Who the fuck is that? 1209 00:47:18,950 --> 00:47:20,530 It's just me, mom. 1210 00:47:20,530 --> 00:47:22,270 Where the fuck you been? 1211 00:47:22,270 --> 00:47:24,450 I've been working mom, go back to bed. 1212 00:47:24,450 --> 00:47:26,730 You get my fucking box out? 1213 00:47:26,730 --> 00:47:29,160 I mean, I feel for him. 1214 00:47:29,160 --> 00:47:30,960 You can take a guy like that, try 1215 00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:36,770 to marshall that kind of cast, with that kind of baggage, 1216 00:47:36,770 --> 00:47:37,640 he doesn't stand a chance. 1217 00:47:37,640 --> 00:47:38,400 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1218 00:47:46,200 --> 00:47:48,280 Mo never had conflicts on his sets. 1219 00:47:48,280 --> 00:47:49,150 He didn't believe in that. 1220 00:47:49,150 --> 00:47:53,200 I mean, Mo's philosophy was, it takes a village to make a porn. 1221 00:47:53,200 --> 00:47:54,560 He had people in the Love Shack who 1222 00:47:54,560 --> 00:48:00,330 had great big hearts, who had immense amounts of tolerance. 1223 00:48:00,330 --> 00:48:02,310 And that collaboration worked. 1224 00:48:02,310 --> 00:48:05,400 Every important innovation in pornography, 1225 00:48:05,400 --> 00:48:08,480 with the exception of the delivery boy and the face shot, 1226 00:48:08,480 --> 00:48:10,170 came from Mo Saltzman. 1227 00:48:10,170 --> 00:48:11,670 NARRATOR: In the late '60s, Mo merged 1228 00:48:11,670 --> 00:48:15,350 pornography and poetry into an experimental genre 1229 00:48:15,350 --> 00:48:16,580 called pornetry. 1230 00:48:19,930 --> 00:48:23,270 I am fear. 1231 00:48:23,270 --> 00:48:25,790 I am unwell. 1232 00:48:25,790 --> 00:48:26,520 I'm a roasted peanut. 1233 00:48:29,460 --> 00:48:31,060 I am my own orgasm. 1234 00:48:31,060 --> 00:48:33,220 NARRATOR: And in 1979 he produced 1235 00:48:33,220 --> 00:48:35,710 Phallus in Wonderland, the world's first computer 1236 00:48:35,710 --> 00:48:37,130 generated porntoon. 1237 00:48:37,130 --> 00:48:37,870 What's my name? 1238 00:48:37,870 --> 00:48:38,740 Steve. 1239 00:48:38,740 --> 00:48:39,800 Say my name, bitch. 1240 00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:40,700 Steve. 1241 00:48:40,700 --> 00:48:42,910 Louder. 1242 00:48:42,910 --> 00:48:45,030 Steve. 1243 00:48:45,030 --> 00:48:45,880 33. 1244 00:48:45,880 --> 00:48:47,470 Didn't we shoot 33 last night? 1245 00:48:47,470 --> 00:48:50,340 Oh, yeah, 90% of it. 1246 00:48:50,340 --> 00:48:52,350 There are just a couple hiccups. -OK. 1247 00:48:52,350 --> 00:48:53,260 Yeah. 1248 00:48:53,260 --> 00:48:56,070 And what about 45? 1249 00:48:56,070 --> 00:48:58,690 Pick ups, a couple inserts. 1250 00:48:58,690 --> 00:48:59,470 And 50? 1251 00:48:59,470 --> 00:49:01,280 Inserts. 1252 00:49:01,280 --> 00:49:02,250 Mac, I've got to be honest. 1253 00:49:02,250 --> 00:49:03,580 The rest of the sheet looks like a xerox 1254 00:49:03,580 --> 00:49:04,510 of yesterday's call sheet. 1255 00:49:04,510 --> 00:49:05,860 We didn't get everything yesterday. 1256 00:49:05,860 --> 00:49:07,220 We got 90% of it. All the exposition and dialogue. 1257 00:49:07,220 --> 00:49:08,200 Well what did we not get? 1258 00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:09,060 Maybe we don't need it. -Everything. 1259 00:49:09,060 --> 00:49:12,750 Great. Then what are we missing? 1260 00:49:12,750 --> 00:49:14,330 The sex. 1261 00:49:14,330 --> 00:49:15,340 The sex? 1262 00:49:15,340 --> 00:49:16,630 Yeah, just a little of the sex. 1263 00:49:16,630 --> 00:49:18,340 What the fuck are people going to be watching? 1264 00:49:18,340 --> 00:49:21,490 People are not coming to a porno for its snappy dialogue. 1265 00:49:21,490 --> 00:49:22,190 Yeah, no. 1266 00:49:22,190 --> 00:49:23,750 That's why Meryl Streep doesn't do porno. 1267 00:49:23,750 --> 00:49:25,250 We've got the best of the best coming up. 1268 00:49:25,250 --> 00:49:26,710 Whitney and Hallie, Spinchter Brothers. 1269 00:49:26,710 --> 00:49:27,730 -Yeah? -Jake Storm. 1270 00:49:27,730 --> 00:49:29,220 Are they going to fuck? Or are they just going to talk? 1271 00:49:29,220 --> 00:49:30,350 Yeah, yeah they're going to fuck. 1272 00:49:30,350 --> 00:49:32,330 Not fucking talking, fucking. 1273 00:49:32,330 --> 00:49:35,910 You're going to hear, you're practically going to smell it. 1274 00:49:35,910 --> 00:49:36,740 Who's your guy. 1275 00:49:36,740 --> 00:49:38,270 -You're my guy. -I'm your guy. 1276 00:49:38,270 --> 00:49:39,820 You guy's not going to let you down. 1277 00:49:39,820 --> 00:49:42,460 It would be so sad if something happened to my guy, right? 1278 00:49:42,460 --> 00:49:43,850 Yeah. Nothing's going to happen. 1279 00:49:43,850 --> 00:49:47,440 -Be my guy. -I'm your guy. 1280 00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:48,510 Yeah. 1281 00:49:48,510 --> 00:49:51,190 And action. 1282 00:49:51,190 --> 00:49:53,000 Ladies it's official. 1283 00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:56,280 Secretary Blomquist is officially dead. 1284 00:49:56,280 --> 00:49:58,590 No, not dead. 1285 00:49:58,590 --> 00:50:00,540 Hands down the biggest asshole I ever met? 1286 00:50:00,540 --> 00:50:03,570 Jake Storm, OK? 1287 00:50:03,570 --> 00:50:04,350 Asshole. 1288 00:50:04,350 --> 00:50:09,050 A lot of different porn stars are-- they're more oh, or uh, 1289 00:50:09,050 --> 00:50:10,960 or darling, it's all about you. 1290 00:50:10,960 --> 00:50:12,270 I'm not like that. 1291 00:50:12,270 --> 00:50:13,060 I'm more like huh? Yeah? 1292 00:50:13,060 --> 00:50:15,170 You want some? Because I've got more. 1293 00:50:15,170 --> 00:50:17,670 Are you sure? 1294 00:50:17,670 --> 00:50:19,980 I was with him for 90 minutes. 1295 00:50:19,980 --> 00:50:21,740 Did you check your stethoscope? 1296 00:50:21,740 --> 00:50:22,720 I did. Twice. 1297 00:50:22,720 --> 00:50:23,650 You know, it's funny. 1298 00:50:23,650 --> 00:50:26,780 They say that the best way to get over tragedy 1299 00:50:26,780 --> 00:50:28,160 is to do something that makes you happy. 1300 00:50:28,160 --> 00:50:28,520 Oh, I know. 1301 00:50:28,520 --> 00:50:29,820 Let's do something that you're in love 1302 00:50:29,820 --> 00:50:32,380 with, something that you want to spend the rest of your life 1303 00:50:32,380 --> 00:50:33,240 with. 1304 00:50:33,240 --> 00:50:34,110 Something that you don't-- 1305 00:50:34,110 --> 00:50:36,670 What the fuck is wrong with you? 1306 00:50:36,670 --> 00:50:38,070 Hey, hey, hey. 1307 00:50:38,070 --> 00:50:40,200 Come on. [SCREAMING] 1308 00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:41,270 No, no, no, girls, girls. 1309 00:50:41,270 --> 00:50:42,680 Knock it off, for God's sake. 1310 00:50:42,680 --> 00:50:44,660 Come on, we've got to-- no, no, no, no! 1311 00:50:44,660 --> 00:50:45,650 Not the wig, it's a rental! 1312 00:50:45,650 --> 00:50:46,640 [SCREAMING] 1313 00:50:48,620 --> 00:50:49,610 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1314 00:50:59,020 --> 00:51:02,020 Shut up. 1315 00:51:02,020 --> 00:51:05,270 Goddammit. [MUSIC PLAYING] 1316 00:51:24,690 --> 00:51:27,150 Do you know what type of underwear your mother wore? 1317 00:51:27,150 --> 00:51:29,220 She always wore one size above what she needed, 1318 00:51:29,220 --> 00:51:33,720 just to have that little extra. 1319 00:51:33,720 --> 00:51:35,800 -What about in azure? -OK, forget it. 1320 00:51:35,800 --> 00:51:36,500 You know what? 1321 00:51:36,500 --> 00:51:37,390 This is it. 1322 00:51:37,390 --> 00:51:38,400 Not happening. 1323 00:51:38,400 --> 00:51:40,240 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1324 00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:58,100 Oh that's great. 1325 00:51:58,100 --> 00:51:59,220 That's really cute. -Hot, right? 1326 00:51:59,220 --> 00:52:00,030 He's hot, too. Yeah. 1327 00:52:00,030 --> 00:52:00,910 -See? -Good. 1328 00:52:00,910 --> 00:52:02,710 Let's see one of the other ones. 1329 00:52:02,710 --> 00:52:04,460 -How about Halle and Whitney? -Yeah. 1330 00:52:04,460 --> 00:52:05,310 Show me the girls. 1331 00:52:05,310 --> 00:52:07,490 That's it. 1332 00:52:07,490 --> 00:52:09,040 That's it for Bud and Lynette. 1333 00:52:09,040 --> 00:52:10,640 Show me-- show another one. A whole other one. 1334 00:52:10,640 --> 00:52:12,400 Yeah. What about Doug and Debbie? 1335 00:52:12,400 --> 00:52:13,330 This is all we've got. 1336 00:52:15,640 --> 00:52:16,340 Mac? 1337 00:52:18,940 --> 00:52:20,190 Oh my God. 1338 00:52:20,190 --> 00:52:21,260 Andre. 1339 00:52:21,260 --> 00:52:22,510 It's going to come together. 1340 00:52:22,510 --> 00:52:23,680 We've got a lot of the dialogue still to shoot. 1341 00:52:23,680 --> 00:52:24,710 You've been coming home every night 1342 00:52:24,710 --> 00:52:25,710 and telling me everything's great. 1343 00:52:25,710 --> 00:52:26,410 It is great. 1344 00:52:26,410 --> 00:52:28,520 Oh I knew you were cleaning the stupid garage for a reason. 1345 00:52:28,520 --> 00:52:29,680 Goddammit. 1346 00:52:29,680 --> 00:52:32,380 Look, I wanted to spare you, because I know how emotional-- 1347 00:52:32,380 --> 00:52:34,630 You've got beautiful women, you've got guys 1348 00:52:34,630 --> 00:52:35,870 who've been doing this forever. 1349 00:52:35,870 --> 00:52:37,470 Put 'em on a set and let them bump vaginas 1350 00:52:37,470 --> 00:52:38,930 and get a fucking movie together. 1351 00:52:38,930 --> 00:52:39,630 Jesus. 1352 00:52:42,300 --> 00:52:44,080 We got-- we got most of the dialogue stuff. 1353 00:52:44,080 --> 00:52:45,250 You are not my fucking guy. 1354 00:52:45,250 --> 00:52:46,510 You are not my fucking guy. 1355 00:52:46,510 --> 00:52:48,120 When you're cutting a film like this, 1356 00:52:48,120 --> 00:52:50,030 it's like you go to one of those all you can eat buffets. 1357 00:52:50,030 --> 00:52:51,370 Way to go, Mitch. 1358 00:52:51,370 --> 00:52:55,390 And as the editor, you pick and choose what looks good. 1359 00:52:55,390 --> 00:53:00,880 And you put it together into a potentially beautiful meal. 1360 00:53:00,880 --> 00:53:05,910 And all we've got now is like a side of coleslaw. 1361 00:53:08,740 --> 00:53:10,250 You know what? 1362 00:53:10,250 --> 00:53:12,710 We had a rough couple of days. 1363 00:53:12,710 --> 00:53:14,620 So I decided to shake things up a little bit. 1364 00:53:14,620 --> 00:53:18,230 I called our leads, told them to take the morning off, 1365 00:53:18,230 --> 00:53:19,780 and get your shit together. 1366 00:53:19,780 --> 00:53:23,030 I'm really glad our scene got pushed back, because I'm 1367 00:53:23,030 --> 00:53:24,620 still in a lot of pain. 1368 00:53:24,620 --> 00:53:27,620 And my depth perception's way off. 1369 00:53:27,620 --> 00:53:32,360 So it's really hard to get around set and everything. 1370 00:53:32,360 --> 00:53:33,950 Well it took a little finessing, 1371 00:53:33,950 --> 00:53:35,770 but I moved some things around. 1372 00:53:35,770 --> 00:53:40,140 I scheduled a scene with Furious George and Carl Munson, 1373 00:53:40,140 --> 00:53:43,270 masters of sado-hygienic cinema. 1374 00:53:43,270 --> 00:53:46,060 -I feel waxy. -Take it. 1375 00:53:46,060 --> 00:53:48,470 I'm still dirty. 1376 00:53:48,470 --> 00:53:50,050 What do you have? 1377 00:53:50,050 --> 00:53:51,020 Gingivitis. 1378 00:53:51,020 --> 00:53:52,730 I can't hear you. 1379 00:53:52,730 --> 00:53:55,400 Gingivitis! 1380 00:53:55,400 --> 00:53:56,580 These guys are total pros. 1381 00:53:56,580 --> 00:53:57,560 We can't mess with these. 1382 00:53:57,560 --> 00:54:00,770 We'll get a couple easy scenes under our belt, 1383 00:54:00,770 --> 00:54:03,090 we'll be back in business. 1384 00:54:03,090 --> 00:54:05,660 And action. 1385 00:54:05,660 --> 00:54:10,300 Did you, or did you not bake the lingonberry pie? 1386 00:54:10,300 --> 00:54:12,110 No. 1387 00:54:12,110 --> 00:54:13,950 Liar. 1388 00:54:13,950 --> 00:54:17,500 Did you, or did you not know that the Secretary Blomquist 1389 00:54:17,500 --> 00:54:19,750 was allergic to lingonberries. 1390 00:54:19,750 --> 00:54:22,650 -I didn't know. -Liar. 1391 00:54:27,100 --> 00:54:29,840 You're a very weak little man, are you not? 1392 00:54:29,840 --> 00:54:32,100 Say it. 1393 00:54:32,100 --> 00:54:33,620 I'm a weak little man. 1394 00:54:33,620 --> 00:54:34,860 I'm a mouse. 1395 00:54:34,860 --> 00:54:36,460 I'm a mouse. 1396 00:54:36,460 --> 00:54:39,150 Liar! 1397 00:54:39,150 --> 00:54:40,950 I'm sorry, that's not any good. 1398 00:54:40,950 --> 00:54:44,080 This fucking sucks. 1399 00:54:44,080 --> 00:54:44,900 We're still rolling. 1400 00:54:44,900 --> 00:54:45,790 All right, we're going. 1401 00:54:45,790 --> 00:54:47,510 From the top. 1402 00:54:47,510 --> 00:54:49,590 Jesus, right? 1403 00:54:49,590 --> 00:54:50,990 Liar! 1404 00:54:50,990 --> 00:54:51,930 Like that? 1405 00:54:55,680 --> 00:54:57,930 I spoke with one of my guys down at the Center 1406 00:54:57,930 --> 00:55:00,510 for Advanced Menopausal studies, and here's what he says we can 1407 00:55:00,510 --> 00:55:03,120 expect out of Furious Georgia. 1408 00:55:03,120 --> 00:55:06,130 Mood swings, irritability, fatigue, 1409 00:55:06,130 --> 00:55:12,040 memory loss, depression, hot flashes, decreased libido, OK? 1410 00:55:12,040 --> 00:55:15,600 Vaginal dryness, and incontinence. 1411 00:55:15,600 --> 00:55:18,780 Now if that doesn't say porn star, I don't know what does. 1412 00:55:18,780 --> 00:55:25,810 Did you, or did you not, bake the lingonberry pie 1413 00:55:25,810 --> 00:55:27,480 that killed the Secretary Blomquist? 1414 00:55:29,910 --> 00:55:30,610 I did not. 1415 00:55:32,650 --> 00:55:33,350 Liar. 1416 00:55:37,440 --> 00:55:40,930 You're almost making me feel as badly about myself as you do. 1417 00:55:40,930 --> 00:55:41,630 Fuck me. 1418 00:55:41,630 --> 00:55:43,520 I can't do it. 1419 00:55:43,520 --> 00:55:45,180 I mean I'm fucking menopausal. 1420 00:55:45,180 --> 00:55:46,750 I didn't have to do this when I was menopausal. 1421 00:55:46,750 --> 00:55:48,240 Do you need some sugar? Do you need a diaper? 1422 00:55:48,240 --> 00:55:51,660 I don't need sugar Hollister, I need hormones. 1423 00:55:51,660 --> 00:55:52,880 It was pretty bad. 1424 00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:54,590 We saw one of the great ones go down today. 1425 00:55:54,590 --> 00:55:56,280 You know, really. 1426 00:55:56,280 --> 00:55:58,390 Truly one of the great ones. 1427 00:55:58,390 --> 00:55:59,370 It rocks me. 1428 00:55:59,370 --> 00:56:00,760 It shakes me. 1429 00:56:00,760 --> 00:56:01,760 [DOG BARKING] 1430 00:56:12,430 --> 00:56:14,780 All right. OK, OK, OK, OK. 1431 00:56:14,780 --> 00:56:15,710 Fuck. 1432 00:56:15,710 --> 00:56:16,640 Fuck. 1433 00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:17,790 Fuck. Fuck. 1434 00:56:17,790 --> 00:56:18,950 Fuck. Fuck. 1435 00:56:18,950 --> 00:56:19,880 Fuck. Fuck. 1436 00:56:19,880 --> 00:56:22,300 Fuck. 1437 00:56:22,300 --> 00:56:23,570 Fuck these fuckers who are fucking me. 1438 00:56:23,570 --> 00:56:24,470 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1439 00:56:53,340 --> 00:56:55,510 This is the moment I've been waiting for for eight years. 1440 00:56:55,510 --> 00:56:56,910 Yeah. Right. 1441 00:56:56,910 --> 00:56:58,550 All right. I'll see you out there. 1442 00:56:58,550 --> 00:57:02,340 It's finally here, me and Marty back in the saddle. 1443 00:57:02,340 --> 00:57:03,300 It's beautiful. 1444 00:57:03,300 --> 00:57:04,960 OK, you guys, you want to take positions? 1445 00:57:04,960 --> 00:57:07,160 -Yeah, we do. -Marty, in the middle please. 1446 00:57:07,160 --> 00:57:09,770 Yeah, OK Marty, you take your spot in the middle. 1447 00:57:09,770 --> 00:57:11,240 Jerry, you're right over his right shoulder. 1448 00:57:11,240 --> 00:57:13,350 LaCienaga, take your one please, right here. 1449 00:57:13,350 --> 00:57:14,510 Beautiful. Ready. 1450 00:57:14,510 --> 00:57:16,300 Roll camera. OK. 1451 00:57:16,300 --> 00:57:19,260 Ready. And action. 1452 00:57:19,260 --> 00:57:20,520 You! 1453 00:57:20,520 --> 00:57:22,970 You slept with Senator Blomquist in the study. 1454 00:57:22,970 --> 00:57:24,950 How could you do that to me? 1455 00:57:24,950 --> 00:57:26,300 Niels, you need to get over it. 1456 00:57:26,300 --> 00:57:30,050 Because you need-- we need to focus on getting an alibi. 1457 00:57:30,050 --> 00:57:32,480 I've been cuckolded by a new [INAUDIBLE]. 1458 00:57:32,480 --> 00:57:34,130 Dammit Niels, you're drunk again. 1459 00:57:34,130 --> 00:57:35,960 Regita's right. 1460 00:57:35,960 --> 00:57:38,070 Constable Bjornson's forces are coming 1461 00:57:38,070 --> 00:57:39,850 at us from the north wing. 1462 00:57:39,850 --> 00:57:41,280 The Swedish National Guard? 1463 00:57:41,280 --> 00:57:43,230 They're coming at us from the south. 1464 00:57:43,230 --> 00:57:45,940 It's only a matter of time before the tips of those two 1465 00:57:45,940 --> 00:57:47,610 forces touch, and-- 1466 00:57:47,610 --> 00:57:49,080 All right, hold it. Hold it. 1467 00:57:49,080 --> 00:57:50,060 Keep rolling, keep rolling. 1468 00:57:50,060 --> 00:57:52,660 The slow thing's not really working for me. 1469 00:57:52,660 --> 00:57:55,020 Establish the forces, the forces, boom! 1470 00:57:55,020 --> 00:57:56,600 And the pounding action. 1471 00:57:56,600 --> 00:57:57,990 They pound down, pounding. 1472 00:57:57,990 --> 00:57:59,340 Pound, pound, pound, pound, pound. 1473 00:57:59,340 --> 00:58:01,970 It's the violence of the smashing of the tips. 1474 00:58:01,970 --> 00:58:04,800 We want to see the jackhammer. 1475 00:58:04,800 --> 00:58:06,460 The tension comes from the violence. 1476 00:58:06,460 --> 00:58:07,060 -Collide. -Collide, collide! 1477 00:58:07,060 --> 00:58:07,760 Yeah. 1478 00:58:07,760 --> 00:58:09,410 But the tips have to-- 1479 00:58:09,410 --> 00:58:11,540 Smash. 1480 00:58:11,540 --> 00:58:14,080 Pound, pound, pound, pound. 1481 00:58:14,080 --> 00:58:16,540 Oh dear God. 1482 00:58:16,540 --> 00:58:18,520 Yes, yes, the jackhammer. 1483 00:58:18,520 --> 00:58:19,640 Marty, Marty wait a minute. 1484 00:58:19,640 --> 00:58:21,660 We're just working the scene here a little bit. 1485 00:58:21,660 --> 00:58:23,960 Marty? 1486 00:58:23,960 --> 00:58:26,030 Get the fuck in here. 1487 00:58:26,030 --> 00:58:28,050 -What was that out there? -What? 1488 00:58:28,050 --> 00:58:28,910 We're shooting a scene. 1489 00:58:28,910 --> 00:58:30,770 Sometimes things get a little hairy. 1490 00:58:30,770 --> 00:58:31,520 A little hairy? 1491 00:58:31,520 --> 00:58:33,620 That was like chaos out there. -Well-- 1492 00:58:33,620 --> 00:58:36,120 The deadline for the Peevies is in two days. 1493 00:58:36,120 --> 00:58:37,150 That's the whole point of this. 1494 00:58:37,150 --> 00:58:38,760 I can shoot this in one day. We got two days? 1495 00:58:38,760 --> 00:58:40,030 Great. No problem. 1496 00:58:40,030 --> 00:58:41,800 Listen, you don't understand how desperate I am, OK? 1497 00:58:41,800 --> 00:58:43,400 Listen. -Look, no-- 1498 00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:45,010 I'm playing with Ted's money here. 1499 00:58:45,010 --> 00:58:47,190 And if Ted's money goes away, Ted's going to get bitchy. 1500 00:58:47,190 --> 00:58:50,320 And if Ted gets bitchy, then I get bitchy. 1501 00:58:50,320 --> 00:58:53,540 And if I get bitchy, trouble ensues. 1502 00:58:53,540 --> 00:58:54,250 You get me? 1503 00:58:54,250 --> 00:58:55,160 I get you, I get you. 1504 00:58:55,160 --> 00:58:56,660 I'll get it, I'll get it Andre. 1505 00:58:56,660 --> 00:58:57,570 You better get it. 1506 00:58:57,570 --> 00:58:58,300 Because you know what? 1507 00:58:58,300 --> 00:59:02,190 If I wanted to get fucked in the ass, I'd go home. 1508 00:59:02,190 --> 00:59:05,660 Well I had a really productive meeting with Andre last night. 1509 00:59:05,660 --> 00:59:08,850 We addressed some concerns that we were both having. 1510 00:59:08,850 --> 00:59:10,960 And I've made some calls, I've taken some measures. 1511 00:59:10,960 --> 00:59:13,850 Everything's going to be, you know, right on track. 1512 00:59:13,850 --> 00:59:15,810 Huh. Yeah, that's really good. 1513 00:59:15,810 --> 00:59:17,920 Essentially I'm a diva doctor. 1514 00:59:17,920 --> 00:59:20,680 I am brought in to sets to different locations 1515 00:59:20,680 --> 00:59:22,380 all around the world. 1516 00:59:22,380 --> 00:59:24,710 And I help everybody solve problems. 1517 00:59:24,710 --> 00:59:28,020 So when I leave, people can skip hand-in-hand. 1518 00:59:28,020 --> 00:59:30,260 Do you remember when you used to fight in grade school, 1519 00:59:30,260 --> 00:59:32,230 and the teacher would make you hold hands with your friend, 1520 00:59:32,230 --> 00:59:34,000 and say, sing the friendship song? 1521 00:59:34,000 --> 00:59:37,180 (SINGING) Make new friends, but keep the old, 1522 00:59:37,180 --> 00:59:41,080 one is silver and the other's gold. 1523 00:59:41,080 --> 00:59:43,970 I can't hit the high note, but I think you know what I mean. 1524 00:59:43,970 --> 00:59:46,350 That's kind of what I do. 1525 00:59:46,350 --> 00:59:47,610 I don't do the song. 1526 00:59:47,610 --> 00:59:49,900 But the song's really in here. 1527 00:59:49,900 --> 00:59:50,920 Hey everybody. 1528 00:59:50,920 --> 00:59:51,990 My name's Kat Waters. 1529 00:59:51,990 --> 00:59:53,470 I'm thrilled to be here. 1530 00:59:53,470 --> 00:59:54,990 I was called upon by your director 1531 00:59:54,990 --> 00:59:57,390 to be an on set negotiator. 1532 00:59:57,390 --> 00:59:58,840 Let's clear the air here. 1533 00:59:58,840 --> 01:00:01,090 I'm going to start a phrase, and you're going to complete it. 1534 01:00:01,090 --> 01:00:03,650 I feel things went wrong when-- 1535 01:00:03,650 --> 01:00:08,030 I feel things went wrong when Hallie showed up. 1536 01:00:08,030 --> 01:00:10,100 We're not going to point fingers yet, OK? 1537 01:00:10,100 --> 01:00:12,180 Because when you point one finger, 1538 01:00:12,180 --> 01:00:13,620 there's three pointing back at you, 1539 01:00:13,620 --> 01:00:15,030 and a big old thumb that's probably 1540 01:00:15,030 --> 01:00:18,060 been in someone's tush, pointing right back at you. 1541 01:00:18,060 --> 01:00:23,010 I felt things went wrong when I can't open my eye right now. 1542 01:00:23,010 --> 01:00:25,660 We're going to do a little thing called leaving the crying 1543 01:00:25,660 --> 01:00:27,010 to the audition room. 1544 01:00:27,010 --> 01:00:28,510 You know we're all adults here. 1545 01:00:28,510 --> 01:00:31,210 And we just need to talk, because little babies cry. 1546 01:00:31,210 --> 01:00:33,970 Oh, oh point Kat Water. 1547 01:00:33,970 --> 01:00:35,850 We really need to be adults here. 1548 01:00:35,850 --> 01:00:36,550 She's good. 1549 01:00:36,550 --> 01:00:37,250 She's very good. 1550 01:00:37,250 --> 01:00:39,480 Kat Waters? 1551 01:00:39,480 --> 01:00:41,240 I saw myself in her. 1552 01:00:41,240 --> 01:00:43,540 And I saw herself on me. You know? 1553 01:00:43,540 --> 01:00:47,190 I just saw the two of us connecting, you know? 1554 01:00:47,190 --> 01:00:51,130 Like two women who know exactly what they want. 1555 01:00:51,130 --> 01:00:51,930 You know? 1556 01:00:51,930 --> 01:00:54,650 Who know how to go at it and get it done. 1557 01:00:54,650 --> 01:00:55,510 That's right. 1558 01:00:55,510 --> 01:00:58,590 Woman to woman, mano a mano, womano a womano. 1559 01:00:58,590 --> 01:01:02,210 Mano a mano, oh ponytail lady in a suit. 1560 01:01:02,210 --> 01:01:03,730 I like your style. 1561 01:01:03,730 --> 01:01:04,580 I love it. 1562 01:01:04,580 --> 01:01:05,980 Cheers to a working lady with a ponytail. 1563 01:01:05,980 --> 01:01:06,960 Right on. 1564 01:01:06,960 --> 01:01:08,920 I'm done. 1565 01:01:08,920 --> 01:01:09,670 That's my water. 1566 01:01:09,670 --> 01:01:10,370 That's my water. 1567 01:01:10,370 --> 01:01:11,650 OK. 1568 01:01:11,650 --> 01:01:11,840 Gretchen, you want to go ahead and start with your demands? 1569 01:01:11,840 --> 01:01:13,180 Yeah, I do. OK. 1570 01:01:13,180 --> 01:01:15,140 The specific demands that we are making 1571 01:01:15,140 --> 01:01:18,320 all pertain to a health issue, and a safety 1572 01:01:18,320 --> 01:01:19,830 issue on behalf of my client. 1573 01:01:19,830 --> 01:01:22,960 She is allergic to glitter, peroxide, the lipstick 1574 01:01:22,960 --> 01:01:25,930 that she uses, pigtails, unwashed pubic hair, 1575 01:01:25,930 --> 01:01:27,140 and baby powder. 1576 01:01:27,140 --> 01:01:28,640 Not to mention the fact that Halle 1577 01:01:28,640 --> 01:01:30,440 has one nipple the size of a yarmulke, 1578 01:01:30,440 --> 01:01:31,950 the other one is an acorn cap. 1579 01:01:31,950 --> 01:01:33,280 That's just disorienting. 1580 01:01:33,280 --> 01:01:34,160 We can't work with that. 1581 01:01:34,160 --> 01:01:35,430 That is outrageous. 1582 01:01:35,430 --> 01:01:37,700 I will not do with that kind of attitude. 1583 01:01:37,700 --> 01:01:39,040 Excuse me. 1584 01:01:39,040 --> 01:01:41,290 These are her demands. 1585 01:01:41,290 --> 01:01:43,420 You're not effective when you yell, dad. 1586 01:01:47,170 --> 01:01:50,510 I'm not comfortable with the unwashed pubic hair. 1587 01:01:50,510 --> 01:01:56,100 We wash every single pubic hair singularly, every day. 1588 01:01:56,100 --> 01:01:56,800 OK. 1589 01:01:56,800 --> 01:01:58,140 I've heard this happening before. 1590 01:01:58,140 --> 01:02:00,420 When girls have that weird unwashed smell, 1591 01:02:00,420 --> 01:02:02,180 it's actually an excess of melon. 1592 01:02:02,180 --> 01:02:05,020 So if you could stop with your honeydew honey, 1593 01:02:05,020 --> 01:02:07,210 I think things will be smelling pretty nice down south. 1594 01:02:07,210 --> 01:02:08,390 Oh she is good. 1595 01:02:08,390 --> 01:02:09,550 She is good. 1596 01:02:09,550 --> 01:02:10,530 So we're OK with that? 1597 01:02:10,530 --> 01:02:11,950 -I won't eat melon. -OK. 1598 01:02:11,950 --> 01:02:12,650 She won't eat melon. 1599 01:02:12,650 --> 01:02:15,820 As far as the nipples go, could we fill in the small one 1600 01:02:15,820 --> 01:02:18,340 with a rouge or a blush? -Something. 1601 01:02:18,340 --> 01:02:20,400 Something that won't come off in a hand once it's pinched. 1602 01:02:20,400 --> 01:02:22,330 Because I see it, and then I'm like, where I am? 1603 01:02:22,330 --> 01:02:23,870 I can't have that. She could fall. 1604 01:02:23,870 --> 01:02:24,910 I could fall over. 1605 01:02:24,910 --> 01:02:28,200 You're sensing that her nipples are like the size of an acorn, 1606 01:02:28,200 --> 01:02:29,700 but you want more of a bagel bite? 1607 01:02:29,700 --> 01:02:30,400 Yes. 1608 01:02:30,400 --> 01:02:32,360 I think we can work this out in make up. 1609 01:02:32,360 --> 01:02:34,770 Are you all right with having a little rouge, maybe 1610 01:02:34,770 --> 01:02:37,660 a little lip liner, something to spread out our areola more 1611 01:02:37,660 --> 01:02:38,800 like a little pizza. 1612 01:02:38,800 --> 01:02:39,500 Is that OK? 1613 01:02:39,500 --> 01:02:40,200 Yes. 1614 01:02:40,200 --> 01:02:41,140 OK. 1615 01:02:41,140 --> 01:02:42,860 I'm hearing that we've kind of wrapped 1616 01:02:42,860 --> 01:02:45,050 this up pretty beautifully. 1617 01:02:45,050 --> 01:02:48,020 I mean, I think we can put a kiss on this stamp 1618 01:02:48,020 --> 01:02:50,150 and put it in the mail. 1619 01:02:50,150 --> 01:02:52,090 Can we put this letter in the mail? 1620 01:02:52,090 --> 01:02:54,740 Send it to me. 1621 01:02:54,740 --> 01:02:57,420 Everybody thinks I'm having some emotional reaction 1622 01:02:57,420 --> 01:02:58,910 to something. I'm fine. 1623 01:02:58,910 --> 01:02:59,720 It's this production. 1624 01:02:59,720 --> 01:03:01,620 I mean, this thing is not a tight ship. 1625 01:03:01,620 --> 01:03:03,650 It's being run like a freaking high school 1626 01:03:03,650 --> 01:03:05,170 production of Pippen. 1627 01:03:05,170 --> 01:03:05,870 Excuse me. 1628 01:03:05,870 --> 01:03:08,190 Oh, hey Marty, can I borrow you for a minute? 1629 01:03:08,190 --> 01:03:09,410 Yeah, sure. 1630 01:03:09,410 --> 01:03:11,380 Cool, thanks. 1631 01:03:11,380 --> 01:03:13,980 It's probably another wardrobe fitting. 1632 01:03:13,980 --> 01:03:14,680 Yeah? 1633 01:03:18,200 --> 01:03:20,060 Come on in, Marty. 1634 01:03:20,060 --> 01:03:23,380 My wardrobe's fine. 1635 01:03:23,380 --> 01:03:25,350 Hey Marty. 1636 01:03:25,350 --> 01:03:27,160 Hey. 1637 01:03:27,160 --> 01:03:28,950 We love you, you know that, right? 1638 01:03:28,950 --> 01:03:30,470 Sure. 1639 01:03:30,470 --> 01:03:33,480 I have a fondness for you. 1640 01:03:33,480 --> 01:03:34,330 What's up? 1641 01:03:34,330 --> 01:03:36,220 We care about you. 1642 01:03:36,220 --> 01:03:37,840 And we feel that you have a problem 1643 01:03:37,840 --> 01:03:40,240 that we need to discuss. 1644 01:03:40,240 --> 01:03:41,300 What are you talking about? 1645 01:03:41,300 --> 01:03:42,580 Jerry, what's he talking about? 1646 01:03:42,580 --> 01:03:45,730 This is an intervention. 1647 01:03:45,730 --> 01:03:47,740 You're having an-- you're having an intervention. 1648 01:03:47,740 --> 01:03:48,880 Why Jerry? 1649 01:03:48,880 --> 01:03:51,390 Why are we having an intervention today? 1650 01:03:51,390 --> 01:03:53,350 Marty, I'm your brother. 1651 01:03:53,350 --> 01:03:55,260 I love you. 1652 01:03:55,260 --> 01:03:59,840 Eight years ago, Rock and a Hard Place. 1653 01:03:59,840 --> 01:04:03,390 LaCienaga was there, Hollister. 1654 01:04:03,390 --> 01:04:05,620 We were doing a scene. 1655 01:04:05,620 --> 01:04:09,590 Something went wrong, terribly wrong. 1656 01:04:09,590 --> 01:04:12,080 What are you talking about? 1657 01:04:12,080 --> 01:04:14,160 You guys touched weiners. 1658 01:04:14,160 --> 01:04:14,940 I got it. 1659 01:04:14,940 --> 01:04:16,210 Marty, we touched tips. 1660 01:04:16,210 --> 01:04:17,810 Let's face it. 1661 01:04:17,810 --> 01:04:19,060 We touched tips. 1662 01:04:19,060 --> 01:04:22,780 How-- how do you know-- how do you know we touched tips? 1663 01:04:22,780 --> 01:04:23,970 I heard it. 1664 01:04:23,970 --> 01:04:24,790 You heard it? 1665 01:04:24,790 --> 01:04:25,760 I heard it. 1666 01:04:25,760 --> 01:04:26,470 I don't know. 1667 01:04:26,470 --> 01:04:27,930 I have no idea what you're talking about. 1668 01:04:27,930 --> 01:04:29,100 You can't run from it, Marty. 1669 01:04:29,100 --> 01:04:30,960 Believe me, everyone knows. 1670 01:04:30,960 --> 01:04:32,040 It's on the internet. 1671 01:04:32,040 --> 01:04:33,790 Not helpful. 1672 01:04:33,790 --> 01:04:34,660 All right. 1673 01:04:34,660 --> 01:04:36,470 All right, fine. 1674 01:04:36,470 --> 01:04:38,540 So what? So what? 1675 01:04:38,540 --> 01:04:40,210 So what if we did touch tips? So what? 1676 01:04:40,210 --> 01:04:41,010 What's the big deal? 1677 01:04:41,010 --> 01:04:42,220 That has to mean something? 1678 01:04:42,220 --> 01:04:43,320 I lost my brother over it. 1679 01:04:43,320 --> 01:04:45,330 Well it's not my fault that your life is shit, 1680 01:04:45,330 --> 01:04:46,730 and mine is fantastic. 1681 01:04:46,730 --> 01:04:47,630 It's not your fault. 1682 01:04:47,630 --> 01:04:49,200 It's not my fault that you're playing 1683 01:04:49,200 --> 01:04:52,150 the banjo on Venice Boulevard, and I'm making 1684 01:04:52,150 --> 01:04:53,690 multimillion dollar deals. 1685 01:04:53,690 --> 01:04:54,390 It's not your fault. 1686 01:04:54,390 --> 01:04:55,130 It's not my fault. 1687 01:04:55,130 --> 01:04:56,240 Well it's partially his fault. 1688 01:04:56,240 --> 01:04:57,630 It's not his fault. 1689 01:04:57,630 --> 01:04:58,940 It's not my fault. 1690 01:04:58,940 --> 01:05:00,780 There were two penises there that day. 1691 01:05:00,780 --> 01:05:02,840 It's not my fault that we don't play catch anymore. 1692 01:05:02,840 --> 01:05:04,440 It's not my fault. I'm not responsible 1693 01:05:04,440 --> 01:05:06,010 for this relationship anymore. 1694 01:05:06,010 --> 01:05:07,450 It's not my fault. 1695 01:05:07,450 --> 01:05:08,850 Talk to me. 1696 01:05:08,850 --> 01:05:12,230 It's not my fault. It's not my fault. 1697 01:05:12,230 --> 01:05:13,970 It's not your fault. 1698 01:05:13,970 --> 01:05:15,580 It's not my fault that we touched tips. 1699 01:05:15,580 --> 01:05:17,510 We touched tips. 1700 01:05:17,510 --> 01:05:19,930 We did it. 1701 01:05:19,930 --> 01:05:23,320 We touched tips. 1702 01:05:23,320 --> 01:05:24,320 We touched tips. 1703 01:05:24,320 --> 01:05:25,660 And we enjoyed it. 1704 01:05:25,660 --> 01:05:27,850 OK, well. 1705 01:05:27,850 --> 01:05:29,360 What? 1706 01:05:29,360 --> 01:05:30,060 We enjoyed it. 1707 01:05:30,060 --> 01:05:32,510 I didn't enjoy it. 1708 01:05:32,510 --> 01:05:33,490 That's disgusting. 1709 01:05:33,490 --> 01:05:34,610 Marty. 1710 01:05:34,610 --> 01:05:36,420 Stay in the room, Marty. 1711 01:05:36,420 --> 01:05:39,420 Marty. 1712 01:05:39,420 --> 01:05:41,220 Did you really enjoy it? 1713 01:05:41,220 --> 01:05:42,240 Wow. 1714 01:05:42,240 --> 01:05:44,760 They enjoyed it. 1715 01:05:44,760 --> 01:05:46,440 That's a little creepy, don't you think? 1716 01:05:49,090 --> 01:05:52,210 Well, those Jews. 1717 01:05:52,210 --> 01:05:53,840 Why am I in charge of the keys? 1718 01:05:53,840 --> 01:05:55,870 It doesn't seem like I would be the guy who would be selected 1719 01:05:55,870 --> 01:05:57,070 to be in charge of the keys. 1720 01:05:57,070 --> 01:05:57,940 Because you were driving. 1721 01:05:57,940 --> 01:05:59,920 Were you in this room? -I don't know. 1722 01:05:59,920 --> 01:06:01,330 I just really want to get out of here. 1723 01:06:01,330 --> 01:06:02,470 Where did you leave them? 1724 01:06:02,470 --> 01:06:04,670 I handed them to you. -I know. 1725 01:06:04,670 --> 01:06:05,490 You gave them to me. 1726 01:06:05,490 --> 01:06:06,860 I had them in my hand. 1727 01:06:06,860 --> 01:06:09,310 And then I-- I remember I put them-- 1728 01:06:09,310 --> 01:06:10,420 Put them where? 1729 01:06:10,420 --> 01:06:12,400 I don't think they're in this room. 1730 01:06:12,400 --> 01:06:14,100 I don't feel-- -Feel? 1731 01:06:14,100 --> 01:06:15,190 Have you looked? 1732 01:06:15,190 --> 01:06:16,060 No, I don't have to look. 1733 01:06:16,060 --> 01:06:16,920 I just feel them. 1734 01:06:16,920 --> 01:06:17,820 See if they're in the room. 1735 01:06:17,820 --> 01:06:18,810 So let's just-- 1736 01:06:18,810 --> 01:06:19,900 Do you remember this room? 1737 01:06:19,900 --> 01:06:21,340 ---get another way home. No. 1738 01:06:21,340 --> 01:06:22,040 I don't. 1739 01:06:22,040 --> 01:06:23,740 It smells like Chinese food. 1740 01:06:23,740 --> 01:06:26,010 This was the room we shot Deep Dish. 1741 01:06:26,010 --> 01:06:27,020 Deep Dish? 1742 01:06:27,020 --> 01:06:29,440 -Yeah. -No. 1743 01:06:29,440 --> 01:06:31,050 You think? -Yeah. 1744 01:06:31,050 --> 01:06:32,970 This was definitely Deep Dish. 1745 01:06:32,970 --> 01:06:33,830 Wow. 1746 01:06:33,830 --> 01:06:36,760 This really smells like cats in here. 1747 01:06:36,760 --> 01:06:38,220 I don't know what that-- 1748 01:06:38,220 --> 01:06:40,660 Do you remember this? 1749 01:06:40,660 --> 01:06:44,530 You know, I have to get back for water practice. 1750 01:06:47,870 --> 01:06:50,740 But I could spare a few minutes. -Nice. 1751 01:06:54,240 --> 01:06:58,980 You were the one that wanted the sausage and pepperoni. 1752 01:06:58,980 --> 01:07:02,660 You must be a meat lover. 1753 01:07:02,660 --> 01:07:03,590 [MOANING] 1754 01:07:08,540 --> 01:07:09,780 Yeah, I remember that. 1755 01:07:09,780 --> 01:07:10,780 You do? 1756 01:07:10,780 --> 01:07:12,780 Mhm. 1757 01:07:12,780 --> 01:07:16,910 We deliver in 30 minutes or less. 1758 01:07:16,910 --> 01:07:19,320 I remember. 1759 01:07:19,320 --> 01:07:20,750 You do deliver. 1760 01:07:20,750 --> 01:07:23,310 You delivered that day. 1761 01:07:23,310 --> 01:07:24,600 Oh that one day, yeah. 1762 01:07:24,600 --> 01:07:27,730 And the day after. 1763 01:07:27,730 --> 01:07:30,960 You were so amazing to me. -Yeah? 1764 01:07:30,960 --> 01:07:31,660 Yeah. 1765 01:07:31,660 --> 01:07:33,280 You totally calmed me down. 1766 01:07:33,280 --> 01:07:34,370 Because I was so nervous. 1767 01:07:34,370 --> 01:07:36,380 And I was completely broken out in hives. 1768 01:07:36,380 --> 01:07:38,170 You know how nervous I was. 1769 01:07:38,170 --> 01:07:40,300 And you massaged me. 1770 01:07:40,300 --> 01:07:41,760 And you have this whole little patter, 1771 01:07:41,760 --> 01:07:42,800 this whole little story-- 1772 01:07:42,800 --> 01:07:43,740 The healing hands. 1773 01:07:43,740 --> 01:07:46,570 Healing hands. 1774 01:07:46,570 --> 01:07:51,080 You know, you've always been really sweet to me. 1775 01:07:51,080 --> 01:07:54,320 You're a really good man. 1776 01:07:54,320 --> 01:07:56,250 You're not too bad yourself. 1777 01:08:02,570 --> 01:08:05,130 Should we try to find the keys? 1778 01:08:05,130 --> 01:08:07,350 I know where the keys are. 1779 01:08:07,350 --> 01:08:09,290 Where? 1780 01:08:09,290 --> 01:08:10,820 I locked them in the car. 1781 01:08:10,820 --> 01:08:11,810 [LAUGHTER] 1782 01:08:12,800 --> 01:08:13,790 [SEXUAL GRUNTING] 1783 01:08:27,930 --> 01:08:29,350 And cut. All right guys. 1784 01:08:29,350 --> 01:08:30,360 Guys, this is beautiful stuff. 1785 01:08:30,360 --> 01:08:31,770 This is gorgeous stuff. 1786 01:08:31,770 --> 01:08:33,460 We're just going to rest some lights. 1787 01:08:33,460 --> 01:08:34,780 Just stay locked down. 1788 01:08:34,780 --> 01:08:35,520 All right, thanks. 1789 01:08:35,520 --> 01:08:36,520 Still there, still there. 1790 01:08:39,620 --> 01:08:41,060 Oh my God, I'll never want to leave. 1791 01:08:44,280 --> 01:08:46,690 It's like a hand in a glove. 1792 01:08:46,690 --> 01:08:48,700 Oh, or a mitten. 1793 01:08:48,700 --> 01:08:50,450 So I was thinking maybe we could 1794 01:08:50,450 --> 01:08:52,300 do something this weekend. -Yeah? 1795 01:08:52,300 --> 01:08:53,370 Yeah. 1796 01:08:53,370 --> 01:08:57,600 Like maybe go for a hike. -Sure. 1797 01:08:57,600 --> 01:08:58,920 -Yeah? -That would be awesome. 1798 01:08:58,920 --> 01:09:00,130 You know what? No, wait. 1799 01:09:00,130 --> 01:09:01,670 The tiler is coming. 1800 01:09:01,670 --> 01:09:04,790 No, I can't do that. 1801 01:09:04,790 --> 01:09:06,160 Whatever. 1802 01:09:06,160 --> 01:09:06,860 No, I mean-- 1803 01:09:06,860 --> 01:09:08,330 Why don't you go on a hike with your tiler? 1804 01:09:08,330 --> 01:09:09,510 ---we just have to finish it up. 1805 01:09:09,510 --> 01:09:10,590 -Oh stop. -No, seriously. 1806 01:09:10,590 --> 01:09:11,630 Go on a hike with your tiler. 1807 01:09:11,630 --> 01:09:13,230 That's an insane thing to say. 1808 01:09:13,230 --> 01:09:13,960 What? 1809 01:09:13,960 --> 01:09:15,030 It's an insane thing to say. 1810 01:09:15,030 --> 01:09:16,490 I'm going to run off with the tiler? 1811 01:09:16,490 --> 01:09:18,440 Everybody's having their little problems. 1812 01:09:18,440 --> 01:09:19,380 It's OK. 1813 01:09:19,380 --> 01:09:20,720 I can bring them back together. 1814 01:09:20,720 --> 01:09:21,960 I'm a problem solver. -Get off me. 1815 01:09:21,960 --> 01:09:23,180 I'm done. -Hang on a second. 1816 01:09:23,180 --> 01:09:24,590 It's just going to take a second. 1817 01:09:24,590 --> 01:09:25,910 I need to leave. 1818 01:09:25,910 --> 01:09:27,500 No, wait, wait, wait, what's happening? 1819 01:09:27,500 --> 01:09:28,160 -Let her go. -What's happening? 1820 01:09:28,160 --> 01:09:28,730 What do you need? -Let her go. 1821 01:09:28,730 --> 01:09:29,610 What do you need? What do you need? 1822 01:09:29,610 --> 01:09:30,200 What do you need? Some water, or-- 1823 01:09:30,200 --> 01:09:30,560 I'm done. 1824 01:09:30,560 --> 01:09:31,870 I'm just completely fucking done. 1825 01:09:31,870 --> 01:09:32,550 Done? Do you need just a break? 1826 01:09:32,550 --> 01:09:33,540 Five minutes? -You know what? 1827 01:09:33,540 --> 01:09:34,610 Let's get somebody else in here. 1828 01:09:34,610 --> 01:09:36,270 I gotta have this today. 1829 01:09:36,270 --> 01:09:37,740 Debbie! -Doug! 1830 01:09:37,740 --> 01:09:39,280 -We were so close. -Doug! 1831 01:09:39,280 --> 01:09:40,980 Debbie, you do not just whistle and I come. 1832 01:09:40,980 --> 01:09:41,900 Doug! 1833 01:09:41,900 --> 01:09:43,110 -What? -Come. 1834 01:09:43,110 --> 01:09:43,950 All right. 1835 01:09:43,950 --> 01:09:45,410 No, no, no, no, no. 1836 01:09:45,410 --> 01:09:46,540 Yeah, OK, look, I admit it. 1837 01:09:46,540 --> 01:09:47,380 We got nothing. 1838 01:09:47,380 --> 01:09:49,720 You know, we've got absolutely fucking nothing. 1839 01:09:49,720 --> 01:09:50,600 But you know what? 1840 01:09:50,600 --> 01:09:53,850 We've still got Halle and Whitney. 1841 01:09:53,850 --> 01:09:55,180 And they're our leads. 1842 01:09:55,180 --> 01:09:57,130 And that's what's going to sell the movie. 1843 01:09:57,130 --> 01:09:59,270 I can sell the whole movie on their scene alone. 1844 01:09:59,270 --> 01:10:00,010 It's going to be hot. 1845 01:10:00,010 --> 01:10:01,350 It's going to be hot, believe me. 1846 01:10:01,350 --> 01:10:02,710 And trust me, they're ready to go. 1847 01:10:05,700 --> 01:10:08,150 Ned and I'm going to need more blush for the baby nipple. 1848 01:10:10,940 --> 01:10:12,110 Oh I'm ready for my scene. 1849 01:10:15,420 --> 01:10:17,090 I'm so ready. 1850 01:10:17,090 --> 01:10:18,650 Agents, if you could clear the set. 1851 01:10:18,650 --> 01:10:20,270 Glamour squad, lay off please. 1852 01:10:20,270 --> 01:10:21,530 All right, looks lovely. 1853 01:10:21,530 --> 01:10:22,430 You know what you're doing? 1854 01:10:22,430 --> 01:10:23,130 OK, great. 1855 01:10:23,130 --> 01:10:24,410 Let's roll sound. 1856 01:10:24,410 --> 01:10:25,200 Rolling. 1857 01:10:25,200 --> 01:10:26,490 Roll camera. 1858 01:10:26,490 --> 01:10:27,260 Speeding. 1859 01:10:27,260 --> 01:10:30,830 And action. 1860 01:10:30,830 --> 01:10:35,410 Ula darling, Ula? 1861 01:10:35,410 --> 01:10:36,660 Ula! 1862 01:10:36,660 --> 01:10:38,040 Come here. 1863 01:10:38,040 --> 01:10:41,360 Have a look at me. 1864 01:10:41,360 --> 01:10:43,590 Aye, miss. 1865 01:10:43,590 --> 01:10:45,440 You look radiant. 1866 01:10:45,440 --> 01:10:48,820 Like a delicate little flower. 1867 01:10:48,820 --> 01:10:51,880 It is no wonder Lars has taken a liking to you. 1868 01:10:51,880 --> 01:10:55,890 Ula darling, you know you can never be with Lars. 1869 01:10:55,890 --> 01:11:00,670 You are a common house frau, nearly twice his age. 1870 01:11:04,320 --> 01:11:06,650 Aye, miss. 1871 01:11:06,650 --> 01:11:07,930 Tis true. 1872 01:11:07,930 --> 01:11:10,160 Oh, your patch. 1873 01:11:10,160 --> 01:11:13,030 Allow me. 1874 01:11:13,030 --> 01:11:14,900 That's better. 1875 01:11:14,900 --> 01:11:16,370 Good. 1876 01:11:16,370 --> 01:11:19,370 Then we'll have no more of that. 1877 01:11:19,370 --> 01:11:21,310 Well, let's see what we have here. 1878 01:11:21,310 --> 01:11:25,030 Oh, my my, what a lot of lingonberries. 1879 01:11:25,030 --> 01:11:28,510 Just what the recipe calls for. 1880 01:11:28,510 --> 01:11:29,710 Fancy a taste? 1881 01:11:29,710 --> 01:11:32,100 You know I don't snack before meals. 1882 01:11:32,100 --> 01:11:34,190 I wasn't talking about the pie. 1883 01:11:34,190 --> 01:11:36,190 Neither was I. 1884 01:11:36,190 --> 01:11:37,230 -Whore. -Bitch. 1885 01:11:37,230 --> 01:11:37,930 Skank. 1886 01:11:37,930 --> 01:11:38,900 Hag. 1887 01:11:38,900 --> 01:11:40,830 Oh, that is it! 1888 01:11:40,830 --> 01:11:42,070 Ula angry. 1889 01:11:44,650 --> 01:11:46,250 You're going down, Captain Hook, and not the way 1890 01:11:46,250 --> 01:11:47,150 you're used to going down. 1891 01:11:47,150 --> 01:11:49,120 Bring it on! 1892 01:11:49,120 --> 01:11:50,760 I'm going to cut your pretty face like I'd 1893 01:11:50,760 --> 01:11:52,320 cut it on the street, lady. 1894 01:11:52,320 --> 01:11:53,400 I'm not afraid of you. 1895 01:11:53,400 --> 01:11:54,370 Oh really? 1896 01:11:54,370 --> 01:11:55,950 Because I'm going to cut you. 1897 01:11:55,950 --> 01:11:57,790 Whoa wait. 1898 01:11:57,790 --> 01:11:58,500 You are going down! 1899 01:11:58,500 --> 01:11:59,370 You are going down! 1900 01:11:59,370 --> 01:12:01,630 You're nuts, you are! 1901 01:12:01,630 --> 01:12:03,520 That crazy bitch pointed a shoe at me. 1902 01:12:03,520 --> 01:12:04,870 -I saw. -Come on, let's go. 1903 01:12:04,870 --> 01:12:06,340 We quit. That's it. 1904 01:12:06,340 --> 01:12:07,240 Goodbye. -You can't quit. 1905 01:12:07,240 --> 01:12:07,980 You're under contract. 1906 01:12:07,980 --> 01:12:09,380 Oh really? You know this sign? 1907 01:12:09,380 --> 01:12:10,400 I'll give it to you again. 1908 01:12:10,400 --> 01:12:11,220 Come on, let's go. 1909 01:12:11,220 --> 01:12:11,920 Amateurs. 1910 01:12:11,920 --> 01:12:13,560 This is out of control. 1911 01:12:13,560 --> 01:12:15,020 You have lost control of this set. 1912 01:12:15,020 --> 01:12:16,080 This movie is done. 1913 01:12:16,080 --> 01:12:17,720 I'm pulling the plug. -We don't need her. 1914 01:12:17,720 --> 01:12:18,720 We can work with just Whitney. 1915 01:12:18,720 --> 01:12:20,150 This movie is no more. 1916 01:12:20,150 --> 01:12:21,730 Mac, you're done. -She's hot. 1917 01:12:21,730 --> 01:12:22,930 She's sweaty. We'll make this happen. 1918 01:12:22,930 --> 01:12:24,450 It's done. Go. 1919 01:12:24,450 --> 01:12:26,260 -Andre, Andre! -Go. 1920 01:12:26,260 --> 01:12:27,800 Go! -Andre. 1921 01:12:35,880 --> 01:12:36,870 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1922 01:12:40,310 --> 01:12:41,160 Thank you. 1923 01:12:41,160 --> 01:12:42,150 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1924 01:13:05,540 --> 01:13:08,620 It's not the end of the world for me. 1925 01:13:08,620 --> 01:13:11,150 But it was a-- it would have been nice for these folks 1926 01:13:11,150 --> 01:13:16,090 to have one last go around. 1927 01:13:16,090 --> 01:13:17,520 I thought this would be a great opportunity 1928 01:13:17,520 --> 01:13:20,670 to see the old gang, and to pay tribute to Mo. 1929 01:13:20,670 --> 01:13:21,630 We came close. 1930 01:13:21,630 --> 01:13:22,890 I think we came close. 1931 01:13:22,890 --> 01:13:23,650 We were almost there. 1932 01:13:23,650 --> 01:13:26,000 I don't know, maybe Mo could have pulled it off. 1933 01:13:26,000 --> 01:13:28,840 It didn't work out the way we thought it would. 1934 01:13:28,840 --> 01:13:32,180 It didn't come together, you know? 1935 01:13:32,180 --> 01:13:34,060 But a work of art is never finished. 1936 01:13:34,060 --> 01:13:35,080 You are so full of shit. 1937 01:13:35,080 --> 01:13:36,090 That's two. 1938 01:13:36,090 --> 01:13:37,810 That's stage two. 1939 01:13:37,810 --> 01:13:38,610 He's working through it. 1940 01:13:38,610 --> 01:13:39,860 You're pathetic. 1941 01:13:39,860 --> 01:13:42,200 I thought this would be good to kind of rekindle things, 1942 01:13:42,200 --> 01:13:44,670 re-- see each other in a different light. 1943 01:13:44,670 --> 01:13:48,780 But I guess only I saw it that way. 1944 01:13:52,010 --> 01:13:54,540 I can't believe they let it come to this. 1945 01:13:54,540 --> 01:13:55,880 It's so stupid. 1946 01:13:55,880 --> 01:13:59,120 I mean, the worst part is, if you needed an actor, 1947 01:13:59,120 --> 01:14:00,600 why didn't you just use me? 1948 01:14:03,230 --> 01:14:05,690 I'm right here, dammit. 1949 01:14:05,690 --> 01:14:08,410 Are you blind? 1950 01:14:08,410 --> 01:14:09,780 You're an idiot. 1951 01:14:09,780 --> 01:14:11,080 Back to one. 1952 01:14:11,080 --> 01:14:12,030 I hate you. 1953 01:14:12,030 --> 01:14:12,770 That's one and four. 1954 01:14:12,770 --> 01:14:14,430 That's nice. -You're an idiot. 1955 01:14:14,430 --> 01:14:15,710 -I know it's painful. -You're an idiot. 1956 01:14:15,710 --> 01:14:16,690 That's four. 1957 01:14:16,690 --> 01:14:17,390 I know it's painful. 1958 01:14:17,390 --> 01:14:18,090 Is it? 1959 01:14:18,090 --> 01:14:19,060 That's four, by the way. 1960 01:14:19,060 --> 01:14:20,900 He went back to two that time. 1961 01:14:20,900 --> 01:14:25,630 I wanted this experience to be something beautiful. 1962 01:14:25,630 --> 01:14:28,190 I wanted it to be two women, you know, 1963 01:14:28,190 --> 01:14:31,460 having that lesbian experience. 1964 01:14:31,460 --> 01:14:33,400 And it just wasn't going to work. 1965 01:14:33,400 --> 01:14:37,130 Whitney and lesbians, uh, uh, uh, they don't work. 1966 01:14:37,130 --> 01:14:38,970 They don't work. 1967 01:14:38,970 --> 01:14:40,370 You know who else doesn't work? 1968 01:14:40,370 --> 01:14:41,210 My maid. 1969 01:14:41,210 --> 01:14:43,280 She is so fucking lazy. 1970 01:14:43,280 --> 01:14:45,050 I'll take a week in the south of France 1971 01:14:45,050 --> 01:14:48,700 and field some offers, and get back to it. 1972 01:14:48,700 --> 01:14:52,830 A couple commercials waiting for me back there. 1973 01:14:52,830 --> 01:14:53,790 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1974 01:15:00,500 --> 01:15:01,930 MO SALTZMAN: Love is a very powerful thing. 1975 01:15:01,930 --> 01:15:04,170 It transcends time. 1976 01:15:04,170 --> 01:15:07,230 You can always find love again. 1977 01:15:07,230 --> 01:15:08,720 It makes, you know, the old young again, 1978 01:15:08,720 --> 01:15:12,660 and the young wise. 1979 01:15:12,660 --> 01:15:14,860 I think people go away from love, 1980 01:15:14,860 --> 01:15:16,920 and then they come back to love, you know? 1981 01:15:16,920 --> 01:15:18,210 And that's where they're the happiest, 1982 01:15:18,210 --> 01:15:22,100 when they find the love again. 1983 01:15:22,100 --> 01:15:23,100 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1984 01:15:38,550 --> 01:15:41,780 I want to thank you all for coming back. 1985 01:15:41,780 --> 01:15:44,730 Listen, I've got something to say. 1986 01:15:44,730 --> 01:15:46,030 I can't do this anymore. 1987 01:15:50,190 --> 01:15:51,510 It's a lie. 1988 01:15:51,510 --> 01:15:52,340 It's all a lie. 1989 01:15:52,340 --> 01:15:53,970 I haven't been working in Europe. 1990 01:15:53,970 --> 01:15:55,620 I've never even been to Europe. 1991 01:15:58,360 --> 01:16:03,840 Ever since Fondling Fathers I've been 1992 01:16:03,840 --> 01:16:05,730 living in my mother's garage. 1993 01:16:05,730 --> 01:16:09,710 And I've been directing books on tape. 1994 01:16:09,710 --> 01:16:14,770 But the biggest lie is that there isn't a steamer trunk. 1995 01:16:19,130 --> 01:16:24,390 Mo didn't leave a script, or a cast list, or anything. 1996 01:16:28,010 --> 01:16:30,790 I just wanted to make another movie. 1997 01:16:30,790 --> 01:16:34,370 And for a little while there, it felt like family again. 1998 01:16:34,370 --> 01:16:38,120 And that's the greatest feeling in the world. 1999 01:16:40,860 --> 01:16:45,660 Now I haven't been true to myself, or to you. 2000 01:16:45,660 --> 01:16:51,270 I don't think that you have been true to yourselves, either. 2001 01:16:51,270 --> 01:16:54,400 Debbie and Doug, my God, your marriage was an inspiration. 2002 01:16:54,400 --> 01:16:56,580 Everybody in the business-- I looked 2003 01:16:56,580 --> 01:17:02,630 for that kind of relationship my whole life, and never found it. 2004 01:17:02,630 --> 01:17:06,270 You can't let the color of carpet 2005 01:17:06,270 --> 01:17:09,270 destroy what you two have. 2006 01:17:09,270 --> 01:17:11,300 Jerry, what happened to you man? 2007 01:17:11,300 --> 01:17:12,370 Where'd you go? 2008 01:17:12,370 --> 01:17:15,800 What happened to that happy go lucky kid from Jew Sandwich? 2009 01:17:15,800 --> 01:17:18,580 Marty, you've just become an asshole. 2010 01:17:18,580 --> 01:17:20,350 You were the best. 2011 01:17:20,350 --> 01:17:22,450 You were the best because you were brothers. 2012 01:17:22,450 --> 01:17:24,520 And you loved each other. 2013 01:17:24,520 --> 01:17:26,190 You touched tips. 2014 01:17:26,190 --> 01:17:27,570 It happens. 2015 01:17:27,570 --> 01:17:28,560 You guys got to get over it. 2016 01:17:32,370 --> 01:17:34,050 This is Mo's Bolex. 2017 01:17:34,050 --> 01:17:38,940 This is the camera that he shot Cock-A-Coodle-Don't on. 2018 01:17:38,940 --> 01:17:42,500 Hey, That's Not Fondue came out of this camera. 2019 01:17:42,500 --> 01:17:44,660 We can do the same thing. 2020 01:17:44,660 --> 01:17:45,840 We can come together. 2021 01:17:45,840 --> 01:17:46,660 We can find the love. 2022 01:17:46,660 --> 01:17:47,540 We can find the family. 2023 01:17:47,540 --> 01:17:48,780 We can take this camera. 2024 01:17:48,780 --> 01:17:52,760 Esteban's got a bunch of short ends we can put together. 2025 01:17:52,760 --> 01:17:55,280 We'll just shoot this thing old school, like Mo did. 2026 01:17:55,280 --> 01:17:59,960 We go out, we set up a scene, everybody at once making love. 2027 01:17:59,960 --> 01:18:02,710 Not just having sex, making love. 2028 01:18:02,710 --> 01:18:04,010 We do it old school. 2029 01:18:04,010 --> 01:18:10,320 No sets, no lights, no props, just the 2030 01:18:10,320 --> 01:18:13,160 love we have for each other. 2031 01:18:13,160 --> 01:18:16,310 No one's seen a film like that in a long time. 2032 01:18:16,310 --> 01:18:18,940 In a long time. 2033 01:18:18,940 --> 01:18:21,820 Now who's with me? 2034 01:18:21,820 --> 01:18:22,940 Who's with me? 2035 01:18:22,940 --> 01:18:24,940 [MUSIC PLAYING] 2036 01:20:28,610 --> 01:20:31,910 All right, Esteban, you set? 2037 01:20:31,910 --> 01:20:33,070 Yeah, we're ready. 2038 01:20:33,070 --> 01:20:34,830 Roll camera. 2039 01:20:34,830 --> 01:20:37,170 Speeding. 2040 01:20:37,170 --> 01:20:45,490 Ready, and Hogman! 2041 01:20:45,490 --> 01:20:48,150 In the end, Hollister did make his deadline. 2042 01:20:48,150 --> 01:20:52,600 And Dial M was nominated for a Best Picture Peevie. 2043 01:20:52,600 --> 01:20:54,940 Unfortunately it lost to Dr. Stinklove 2044 01:20:54,940 --> 01:20:56,440 or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love 2045 01:20:56,440 --> 01:20:59,090 the Bum, which starred Halle Lujah 2046 01:20:59,090 --> 01:21:01,690 in her first anal release. 2047 01:21:01,690 --> 01:21:04,800 But even though it didn't win an award or get any recognition, 2048 01:21:04,800 --> 01:21:07,720 I do feel that the picture did exactly what 2049 01:21:07,720 --> 01:21:09,230 Mo would have wanted it to do. 2050 01:21:09,230 --> 01:21:11,620 For millions of porn fans, it gave 2051 01:21:11,620 --> 01:21:15,890 them something to-- something to masturbate to 2052 01:21:15,890 --> 01:21:18,400 for years to come. 2053 01:21:18,400 --> 01:21:20,270 Now. 2054 01:21:20,270 --> 01:21:21,240 Find your target. 2055 01:21:21,240 --> 01:21:22,580 All right. 2056 01:21:22,580 --> 01:21:25,500 What does she do that disrespects you? 2057 01:21:25,500 --> 01:21:26,730 You don't even have to say anything. 2058 01:21:26,730 --> 01:21:28,160 I just want that visual image-- -Oh, I see it now. 2059 01:21:28,160 --> 01:21:29,110 Hit the nail. -Use that visual image. 2060 01:21:29,110 --> 01:21:30,400 -Put in the nail. -Put in the nail. 2061 01:21:30,400 --> 01:21:32,360 Well I'll tell you what, what's exciting and wonderful 2062 01:21:32,360 --> 01:21:33,250 right now. 2063 01:21:33,250 --> 01:21:36,440 We've created this new company called Erect and Connect. 2064 01:21:36,440 --> 01:21:38,400 We're really working on remodeling 2065 01:21:38,400 --> 01:21:40,300 people's homes, which is where we found frcition. 2066 01:21:40,300 --> 01:21:41,510 Mhm. 2067 01:21:41,510 --> 01:21:42,230 And, well-- 2068 01:21:42,230 --> 01:21:43,880 Remodeling their lives. 2069 01:21:43,880 --> 01:21:45,570 I don't want to lose a nail. 2070 01:21:45,570 --> 01:21:46,970 Honey, do you want to lose your marriage? 2071 01:21:46,970 --> 01:21:48,490 Do you see my nails? 2072 01:21:48,490 --> 01:21:49,460 Have you seen your marriage? 2073 01:21:49,460 --> 01:21:50,970 Love and honor. 2074 01:21:50,970 --> 01:21:52,200 It's the teamwork. 2075 01:21:52,200 --> 01:21:53,950 Oh honey, hold this. OK. 2076 01:21:53,950 --> 01:21:55,690 I'll be there. I'll support you. 2077 01:21:55,690 --> 01:21:58,170 And then they support the beam, and the husband or the wife 2078 01:21:58,170 --> 01:21:59,410 hammers the nail. 2079 01:21:59,410 --> 01:22:01,130 And there's the sawing. 2080 01:22:01,130 --> 01:22:03,130 And then there's screwing. 2081 01:22:03,130 --> 01:22:07,370 And then there's screwing. 2082 01:22:07,370 --> 01:22:09,090 After Dial M's release, Mac Hollister 2083 01:22:09,090 --> 01:22:12,200 was immediately catapulted back onto the A-list. 2084 01:22:12,200 --> 01:22:13,940 Glen, I wanted teal. 2085 01:22:13,940 --> 01:22:16,130 And he signed several international endorsement 2086 01:22:16,130 --> 01:22:18,490 deals. 2087 01:22:18,490 --> 01:22:21,840 My urban sprawl. 2088 01:22:21,840 --> 01:22:24,190 My mini mall. 2089 01:22:24,190 --> 01:22:24,930 My giant balls. 2090 01:22:28,060 --> 01:22:30,210 My home is in the valley. 2091 01:22:30,210 --> 01:22:32,470 My cigar is El Guapo. 2092 01:22:38,180 --> 01:22:39,280 Could you sign your nads for me? 2093 01:22:39,280 --> 01:22:41,120 Yeah. You want to write on the balls? 2094 01:22:41,120 --> 01:22:43,990 I feel like I've been blessed this past year. 2095 01:22:43,990 --> 01:22:47,830 The film we're working on next is titled Special Ned. 2096 01:22:47,830 --> 01:22:51,570 And it's about a mentally handicapped high school 2097 01:22:51,570 --> 01:22:54,720 student who vows to lose his virginity 2098 01:22:54,720 --> 01:22:56,220 before the end of the summer. 2099 01:22:56,220 --> 01:23:00,130 And as you know, handicapped kids have a hard time 2100 01:23:00,130 --> 01:23:02,410 getting laid in real life. 2101 01:23:02,410 --> 01:23:06,330 Through this film we hope to inspire other handicapped kids 2102 01:23:06,330 --> 01:23:08,620 to go out there and try it. 2103 01:23:08,620 --> 01:23:12,620 Safe, not rape. 2104 01:23:12,620 --> 01:23:13,730 Whose idea was that? 2105 01:23:13,730 --> 01:23:14,870 That's gross. 2106 01:23:14,870 --> 01:23:17,060 Not to get retarded kids out raping people, 2107 01:23:17,060 --> 01:23:21,330 but to inspire them to live normal lives. 2108 01:23:21,330 --> 01:23:23,630 What the fuck is this? 2109 01:23:23,630 --> 01:23:26,000 But no one benefited more from the experience 2110 01:23:26,000 --> 01:23:28,620 than Kat Waters and Gretchen Becky. 2111 01:23:28,620 --> 01:23:30,360 A week after the film wrapped, they 2112 01:23:30,360 --> 01:23:32,350 were married at the Love Shack. 2113 01:23:32,350 --> 01:23:33,210 -I just came. -Too loud. 2114 01:23:33,210 --> 01:23:34,400 -Hi. -Too loud. 2115 01:23:34,400 --> 01:23:35,090 Hey, too loud. 2116 01:23:39,000 --> 01:23:41,190 We don't actually do the Ferber method. 2117 01:23:41,190 --> 01:23:44,340 We don't them-- we don't let her cry it out. 2118 01:23:44,340 --> 01:23:47,350 But what we do is, it's a shrieking technique. 2119 01:23:47,350 --> 01:23:48,790 Watch this. 2120 01:23:48,790 --> 01:23:49,750 [SHRIEKING] 2121 01:23:53,590 --> 01:23:55,040 Calms them right down. 2122 01:23:55,040 --> 01:23:56,650 I don't think that you can't overstate 2123 01:23:56,650 --> 01:24:00,290 the importance of the Sphincter Brother's reconciliation. 2124 01:24:00,290 --> 01:24:03,800 But sadly, the story doesn't end there. 2125 01:24:03,800 --> 01:24:07,080 During the Dial M orgy, Jerry accidentally entered 2126 01:24:07,080 --> 01:24:09,790 Marty's anus for eight seconds. 2127 01:24:09,790 --> 01:24:11,290 Oh, whoa whoa. 2128 01:24:14,910 --> 01:24:16,290 How would I like to be remembered? 2129 01:24:16,290 --> 01:24:20,090 I think I've created a lot of love, you know? 2130 01:24:20,090 --> 01:24:23,010 Through the relationships I've created, you know? 2131 01:24:23,010 --> 01:24:25,290 I've brought some fantastic people 2132 01:24:25,290 --> 01:24:28,200 together who have fallen in love, 2133 01:24:28,200 --> 01:24:29,770 and created love, and made love. 2134 01:24:29,770 --> 01:24:32,030 And they spread their love. 2135 01:24:32,030 --> 01:24:37,050 To be the acorn of so much love is such a wonderful legacy. 2136 01:24:37,050 --> 01:24:40,500 And I think that's a beautiful way to be remembered, 2137 01:24:40,500 --> 01:24:45,780 as the acorn of love. 2138 01:24:45,780 --> 01:24:46,670 Or with a plaque. 2139 01:24:47,670 --> 01:24:49,920 [MUSIC PLAYING]